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22 ,
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tennoji , osaka ' the next day
you contemplated what to do. telling atsumu you were pregnant might change the whole relationship, but maybe it would make you two closer. although you had wanted it to be serious with him, you never saw yourself in this position. life had been throwing a lot of loops at you lately. you decided the best option was to just propose the idea of a kid, not directly say you were pregnant.
"you know," you cuddled closer to atsumu, "with kiyoko having her baby and everything, it got me thinking..." you stopped as you looked up from his chest to his eyes. "maybe we should have one—together," you let it sink in, he took a small moment to reply.
"well i really like that angel, but i'm not too sure about right now," he slowly brushed your hair with his fingers, "there's no doubt i wanna have kids with you, but let's wait. there's no need to rush, right?" he really did listen to your whole rant about taking things slower...it made your face warm up. he was so gentle with you, it almost made you forget that you were carrying a fetus inside of you. what the hell would you do now?
"oh," your response took him by surprise, he thought he'd accumulated the perfect thing to say to you.
"i figured waiting would be the best option, with my career and everything i don't know if we're ready yet," he blinked at your tears. it clicked, he exhaled, "are you trying to say you're pregnant?"
your face was buried in his chest, and you only gave a small nod while gripping his body with your arms. you whimpered as he slowly rubbed your back. the only thought running through his head was,
it's definitely mine, right?
...
when you calmed down atsumu tried talking to you. he wanted you to know it was okay, and he would be by your side through the whole thing. "i want this baby with you f/n," he reassured you, but this whole thing drove you insane. you weren't married, with this news your parents would be anything far from happy.
"i don't want you to feel like you have to have this kid, you already have two!" you were proposing an idea he didn't like, you saw his eyes break away from yours. it shattered him, he couldn't just get rid of his kid—possibly his kid.
"i don't think i can do that f/n," he threw up in his mouth at the idea of an abortion, but at the same time...it was your choice. it was too much for him in such little time, he couldn't hold back, "if it's even mine."
what does he mean? does he know?
"it's yours atsu, i promise!" you felt like shit, he knew about what you'd done. you felt your skin crawl, you were dirty. "i made him wear a condom," you paused and blinked away the tears. you had talked about this before, and he said he really had no reason to be angry. he was still pretty mad nonetheless, he didn't do anything during that time—except jerk himself off.
"i don't want to argue anymore, please f/n, just consider my feelings in this," he was being super considerate, and you figured maybe you should take his feelings into play. keeping the baby couldn't be too bad...
for the first time you got that feeling you'd craved, being able to write "from: mommy & daddy" on your little boy's birthday gift.
you got that feeling of worry when he wondered only a little ways away from you.
you got that gut feeling of knowing your kid was in danger, you felt it rush through your bones. it was like nothing before, you truly felt like a mom.
but then you got that feeling of distraught, your stomach twisted into knots, and your body ached with pain. you couldn't bare it, your boy was hurt.
atsumu got off the couch, leaving you alone with these thoughts. maybe he was right, keeping this baby meant new opportunities, it meant having more of atsumu.
"wait, i want to keep the baby!"
...
a/n : sorry this took forever!!!!! i hope u like it <3 (a lil bit of a longer one to make up for the 20 days i made y'all wait xd) i didn't rly know what to write but watching some netflix helped LMAO
