I just can't wait for vidcon;i will meet yamimash,wade,bob,felix,and ooohhhh markiplier.You can't blame a 18 year old for likeing a hot,sexy,sweet,and amazing guy. I got ready and drove to VIDCON. My hair was wavey so i left it down. My black veil brides shirt, grey skinny jeans, and my favorite black and white high top converse.I wore my favorite grey jacket that has holes on the sleves so my thumbs would go there.I got some food inside and saw bob and wade. I walked up to them and said hi. "HI bob and wade", I said. "how do you know our names", Wade said. "well your name tags",they looked at thier name tags "and because you built a penis in minecraft". I walked away with my sassyness behide me. I could hear bob laughing. I went around and got an autograph from Yamimash. "Why are you wearing that sweater", he asked. I knew i couldn't tell him. "bye yami",i said weakly. I ran to the girls bathroom and yami was chaseing after me. I started to cry and opened a stale. I rolled up my jacket sleve; bite marks on my arm and a few brusies. I didn't cut because i am to scared to cut my arm or thigh. I do lightly cut. Putting a nail and making a red mark so it lifts up. I have written thing my mother and people have said to me on me. I check if yami was still there i wanted to find markiplier. I finilly find him but something happened that i thought would never happen. "well hi what is your name", Mark asked me. "jacinda", I said weakly. I quickly wiped the tears from my eyes. "It is to hot for a jacket", Mark said. Without me noticeing mark took my jacket off for me. His eyes opened wide as he saw my semi slender arms. I looked at him and tilted my head and then i looked around me. People all looking at me. A slight gust of wind blew and i felt a chill. I look and notice my sweater is off. I look at him and say onlt the words that came to my head." why.... WHY would you do this me. You were my idol and my hero,i felt the tears down my face, made him look even more sad," I hate you now". I then grabed my jacket out of his arm and put it on fast as i ran away to my car. I cryed for a while and then drove to my hotel. I lied in bed and cheaked to see what was new on youtube. I saw that mark made a video on depession and self harm. I cryed my self to sleep. I can't wait to go home so i can get that "hero" out of my head.