She stood in the entrance hallway, kneading her hands together and biting her lip, so many different things she could say running through her head. He slung the backpack over his shoulder, more than ready to leave, to stop causing her pain.
"Wh-why?" was the only word that got past the lump in her throat.
He loved her, gosh, he loved her so much. Hearing the tears weigh down her voice only made him feel worse. No matter how loud his brain was shouting at him to step through the door and to never look back, to never hurt her again, his heart won over, and his heand slipped from the door knob.
"Brady, why?" she whispered, barely loud enough for him to hear.
She was holding her arms around her torso, holding together the pieces of her breaking heart. The boy she loved clenched his fist before running his hand through his hair, the way he did when he was frustrated.
"Tess, I..." He gathered his thoughts before speaking, so afraid of saying something, of saying anything wrong to this unbelievably fragile girl, who he knew was only one word away from falling apart. "Tess, I'm not enough for you."
"How could you ever think that?" she asked, her voice wavering with the child-like emotion she always seemed to have about her.
His hand was back on the door knob, the fear that he would make her cry slowly growing. "You see the way you're hurting now? It's my fault. I've messed up so many times with you, Tess. I've broken you too many times."
And he was out the door and into the snow before she could say anything else. He had only taken four steps by the time she was at the door, and he was already to his car by the time she was shouting at him.
"I love you! Doesn't that count for anything? The past few years, don't those matter at all? We've gotten through things like this before! It'll be okay, right?" Her voice faltered. "Right...?"
There was such a tone of desperation in her voice that made tears sting the corners of his eyes. And just like him, she was trying her best to keep the floodgates shut. The pain was making his temper shrink, bringing him closer to shouting every thought on his mind with no filter, everything about how he would never stop loving her. He knew that that would help almost nothing, so he kept his mouth shut.
She was visibly shaking now. "P-please, come inside. We can talk about this."
He took one glance back, catching a glance at this undeniably beautiful girl who had been his for so long, this girl who he would never stop loving. Even from his car, he could see the way her eyes were watery and the slight quiver of her lip; he could see the snowflakes caught in her hair and brushing her bare legs, which he hoped she would cover up soon. He hated leaving her like this, but it would be even worse for both of them if she was sick and had no one to hold her tight in bed while she had a raging temperature.
Going through with her request would make this so much easier for her, so he complied. His hand slipped off the car door handle as he took a deep breath and spun on his heel, willing himself to keep his emotions at bay for just a little longer. With large strides, he walked back to the sidewalk where she was standing, cradling herself and breathing softly, making little clouds in the cold air. The boy mumbled something about her being cold before slipping off his backpack and taking off his jacket, wrapping it around the shivering girl in front of him.
She pulled the heavy jacket tightly around herself, nearly drowning in the smell of him, before leading him back inside even though he knew this house like the back of his hand. He closed the door behind himself, dropping his heavy backpack on the floor for possibly the last time. At the moment, they both had their emotions in check, but they were both only a few blows away from breaking.
The girl sat on one end of the old dark blue couch that they had had forever, curling into a ball and hugging her knees to her chest. It was taking every ounce of strength she had to not pull him close and kiss him and tell him that everything would be okay; she honestly didn't know if anything would ever be okay again. Millions of memories flooded his mind as he sat down on the opposite end of the couch, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. Every square inch of this building held special things for both of them, and they sat in the silence, merely soaking it all in.
Her voice was quiet when she spoke, but her words seemed to echo through the painful quiet. "Can-can I kiss you goodbye, just one last time...?"
She had no idea if this would help the situation, but she needed to feel his lips on hers again, just this once, to know that he was still here for now, that he was still hers, even if just for this moment. He looked at her, fully taking her in now, and the walls he had been working on building up over the past half hour came crashing down. Gosh, she was so beautiful, so indescribably lovely, and she had the most golden heart. Snow dusted her messy hair, and her wide innocent eyes were shining with tears she wanted so desperately to keep in. Her fingers barely came out the sleeves of his jacket, the one he would never grow tired of her wearing.
"Y-you can kiss me, Tess," he answered, emotion finally making his voice heavy.
With a small nod of her head, she uncurled from her ball and leaned over the space that separated them, her breath coming out in small minty puffs. Their eyes closed and their lips touched, sending shock waves down both of their spines. He was once again reminded of how much he loved this girl. As her lips melted against his, he was getting drunk off of the pure essence of her, just all of her. Her eyes, her nose, the freckles across her cheeks, her scent, her warmth, just everything about her.
The way his lips felt against hers was so familiar. Her body reacted the same way it always did to him: goosebumps raising on her skin, warmth flooding her veins, her heart beating out of her chest. She loved him with everything she had, and she knew she would never stop loving him. He was a drug, and she was getting high once again.
Every emotion both of them felt was put out in the open with their lips. Her freezing lips on his. His warm hands running down her sides. She pulled away, her giant eyes staring deeply into his as she whispered six simple words:
"I love you, forever and always."
As those words processed in his mind, he made his decision and his lips were back on hers before either of them had taken a breath. Thinking back on the reasons he was leaving, he didn't know why he had decided to go. He held her as close to him as he dared, afraid to break the fragile girl any more than he had already, but he would be here to pick those broken pieces up. She clutched onto his shirt with freezing fingers, not being able to get close enough to him.
He pulled away slightly, his lips still ghosting over hers, and he whispered the only thing he knew now, with her body pressed up against his and her heart beating against his chest.
"I love you. I always will."
She moved her head to where she could see straight into his eyes, so scared that this was all just a dream and that he would be gone when she woke the next day. Her gaze flicked around his face, searching for any trace of a lie, but she found none, only warmth in the face of the boy she loved. He kissed her forehead softly, hugging her to him and resting his chin on her head, leaning back to rest in the arm of the couch. A yawn escaped her mouth as she fell into him, wrapping herself in his scent. He kissed her forehead again, gathering her into his arms.
"Go to sleep, Tess, I'll be here when you wake up, don't worry."
She slowly drifted off, feeling at home in his arms, and he watched over her, intending to be there when she woke.
YOU ARE READING
A Collection: Stories and Poems
Short Story"Writers see the world differently. Every voice we hear, every face we see, every hand we touch could become story fabric." -Buffy Andrews
