My friend Jenny and I wrote this little story together. Yep, we're weirdos.
VIVIAN: It was a lovely day in Rivendell. The birds were chirping, and in the air was the sweet aroma of gardinia flowers. Arwen had heard loud bass music coming from her fathers room, and it was disturbing the peaceful morning. Arwen marched to her fathers room and pounded on the old oak door. "Come in!" Answered Elrond in a sing-song voice. When Arwen opened the door, her eyes were assalted with the view of Elrond practicing his belly dancing.
JENNY: "What on earth are you doing father?!" Arwen asked in a stern yet confused tone. "Why isn't it quite clear my daughter. I'm practicing my belly dancing!" Elrond said I'm the most cheerful voice. Elrond continued to practice as Arwen continued to stand in the doorway getting angrier and angrier. At last she could stand it no longer. "FATHER COULD YOU PLEASE STOP THIS HORRID THING CALLED BELLY DANCING!" She screamed at the top of her lungs. Elrond slowly turned around.
VIVIAN: "Well Arwen, an Elf really does have to keep his figure." He stated, running his hands down his hips. Arwen gagged and had to look away. She was quite disturbed with the sight of her half naked father. "At least turn the music down a bit. I can't enjoy the morning with the whole house shaking.". Elrond rolled his eyes and turned the music to a more acceptable volume. "Thank you." Arwen said curtly, and Elrond continued his belly dancing. "Father, please let me leave the room first before you continue." Arwen said, starting to feel queezy. Just then, Glorfindel strode into the room. "Milord, there are visitors. Mithrandir, 2 hobbits, and a human girl...by the way, nice moves milord!".
JENNY: "A human girl?.....well let them all in at once!" Elrond exclaimed. "Yes milord." Glorfindel turned and swiftly left. "My dear hobbits and human." Mithrandir said. "This is Rivendell. " "it looks beautiful!" The girl said. "When do we get to go inside?!"
VIVIAN: "Well, we must wait for Lord Elrond to grant us permission to enter." Answered Gandalf. Frodo was paying no attention as he was still sitting on his pony playing with his Gameboy Advanced. Sam looked at him from afar, sighing to himself and rubbing his lips. Suddenly, many Elves dressed in elegant tunics came. "Hello Mithrandir." They called happily. "Hello! Hello!" Gandalf said hugging an elf. The elf slapped Gandalf heartily on the back and there was a loud cracking noise. "MY BACK!" yelped Gandalf. The Elves looked at him in alarm. The other Elves went to help Frodo off his pony, but he kept slapping their hands away. "Let me kill these guys first!" Huffed Frodo in fustration.
JENNY: "Look quit squirming and come along!" Huffed one of the elves as he took away Frodo's Gameboy Advanced. "HEY!!!" Frodo yelled in a booming voice. "THAT'S MINE!" He immediately sprang into action and threw himself on the elf that took his Gameboy. "UGH get off me you hobbit!!!!!!" "Not until I get my gameboy back!" "Will you fools stop horsing around and help me!?" Gandalf boomed as another crack came from his back. The pain was too much for Gandalf to handle and he fell to the floor.
VIVIAN: "Gandi!" Cried the human girl. She ran towards Gandalf and tried lifting him up. Frodo bit the Elf's ear off and retrieved his Gameboy Advanced. "My precious..." Frodo murmured and stuffed it in his fannypack. The Elf cried in alarm, and grabbed a mirror. "I LOOK UNEVEN! I WILL NEVER BE BEAUTIFUL AGAIN!" He sobbed, and died of grief.
JENNY: "This is complete madness." one of the elves said. Gandalf was still laying on the floor. The poor girl could not lift him. "Hey you know you guys could help! He's hurt and you're just standing there!" The elves just like at her stern-fully and continued to talk. "What on middle earth is she?" "I think I heard Lord Elrond say she was a human!" The 2 elves stared at her.The girl was getting furious at the elves. She slowly stood up from Gandalf's side and began to walk towards the elves that refused to help poor Gandi.
VIVIAN: The now very angry girl snapped her fingers in a Z formation at the Elves. They felt highly offended. Just then, Lord Elrond pranced in and was shocked to see the image before him. Everyone grew quite and stared at the shocked Elven Lord. "Hakuna Matata," He muttered. The Elves hastily got the visitors up and prepared to meet Elrond. Gandalf was first to greet him. "Hello, old friend. Its been too long..." chuckled Gandalf, giving Elrond a firm slap on the buttock, for that was how the Elven Lords greeted guests. "Yes, Mithrandir. It has," Elrond replied, returning Gandalf's slap. "And I see you've brought Hobbits with you again!"
TO BE CONTINUED...
