Pretty Reckless

03

I hear the sound of the trains departing and arriving. I hear the cars. I hear the sound of beeping. I hear the sound of doors opening and closing. I hear the airport. I hear the bell. I hear the sound of everything. The sound of rain. The sound of a heartbeat. The sound of life. The sound of my life. Falling away. I looked toward the pills. The pills that could ruin my life.

Mary. Mary Piping. 15. CA. Lo. Alec. Henry. Pills. Suicide. Life.

Life hasn't been easy for me. Friendship aren't easy. Trying to be popular. Trying to live my life. Trying to be able to have good friends. Trying to be funny. Acting like my life was good. Acting like I have good parents. It hasn't been easy. My step-dad is horrible. He's my nothing. He's my problem. He's part of the reason I'm doing this.

one

: Bryce Walker :

⏯ You were the "cool" guy. The guy who loved to fool around. The guy who could be annoying. Cool. Generous. Not the guy who everybody loves, but the guy that most people do. You kind of ruined my life. You want to know how?

➳ I was at a party. You were there too. You invited me. I gladly took the invitation. I thought you were nice. Instead of hanging around me, you just hung out with your ugly mean friends. You called me names. I think you were drunk on Kool Aid. I don't know how.. but you were. You were my ride to the party so I had no other ride home. Unless there was someone else. I asked Cath. She was kind enough to take me home. Instead of letting me go, you grabbed my arm and yanked me and told me to stay. I didn't want to. You started yelling at me. I punched you and ran into Cath's car. I hope you remember.

two

: Amanda Grander :

⏭ Hello Amanda.. You were the girl who everybody drooled over. Or rather not. Girls teased you. For your braces. Braces. What's the big deal of braces? They make your teeth straight. That's what you said when someone teased you because of your braces. I agreed and liked that you stood up for yourself. I wanted to become friends. Unfortunately, that was a mistake.

⇠ Remember? At your house. The sleepover. We were friends. I wonder if we were good friends. I hope we were. You seemed really nice. We had dinner. I had my sleeping bag. We giggled. We laughed. I always wondered why you invited me. But I didn't care at the moment. The thought still bugged me. In the back of my mind. I laughed. I ate. I slept. No, I didn't. I just talked and talked with you. At last, we calmed down and got to sleep. You got out of the bed and grabbed your phone, thinking I was asleep. I wasn't. But you didn't know. You faced your screen to me and started to texting. I saw every single text. Some of them where about me. I was hurt, but didn't show it. I didn't want our friendship to end. Or rather become enemies. I guess becoming friends wasn't a good choice. Later, we had a fight. I blurted out what happened. You looked shocked. Hope you remember.

three

: Charles Swainbag :

⏯ Hey Charles. The one and only. Charles Swainbag.. The nerdy guy. The guy who knows how to fix anything. "Anything". The guy that not everybody liked. Yup. Do you remember that time.. At the classroom. Maybe Classroom 41?

Yeah. I think you remember. Totally. Big deal. Let's repeat the story...

We were both in Math Class when the teacher got a phone call. From the office. It was for you. You just stood up and sat down again. Out of nowhere, I said, "Go. Go to the office. God." You stared at me. Like the others in the class. I blushed. You blushed. I made the shooing figure. You slowly walked toward the door. When you left, the whole class started chattering. You were the good guy. The good student. When you came back, everyone started laughing. Rather, they were silent. You started laughing, when it was silent, but you stopped because it was awkward for you. The teacher was still teaching the lesson, trying to make it non-awkward. But it was way awkward. You stared right at me and I shrugged. You stared at me, keeping your glare. For some reason, that made me uncomfortable. Obviously. You sat down and I threw a piece of paper at you. You looked at the paper and wrote something and threw it back. I looked at it and it said, "What the heck did you do. Get out of my stupid life. It's always your fault." I crumpled the paper and threw it in your face. It was left in my mind. The back of my mind.

four

: Reid Bruice :

⏭ Hi Reid Bruice. How are you? Feeling reckless? Or not? I remember when we met in the mall. You stared at me and I stared at you. I looked away and looked back. You raised your eyebrows, as if to show if you won. Won a weird game. I glared back. You just shrugged. You walked up to me and said, "Wanna... go to the bookstore?" I shrugged and walked with you. It was silent while we walked. When we arrived, you put your hand on my shoulder. I shivered. I had this one crush on you. You influenced people to like you. Or forced. But I didn't know that. I let you show me the way to where you wanted me to go. You showed me this book that was about dodo birds. I didn't really like them, but you did, so I looked at them. You smiled, thinking I liked them. I DIDN'T. You did look nice. I hope I did. I don't know. Do you remember? Hope you do. I think we became boyfriend and girlfriend. Maybe. I forgot.

five

: Mieko Bunya :

⏮ Hello Mieko! Do you remember me? Remember when we went to the store together? That was fun! We bought a lot of clothes, merchandise, food. We laughed, we giggled, we bought. It was like a shopping spree. You came from Japan. I liked your clothes. They were cute. We also listened to music. On our iPods. Or was it iPhones? I remember one song that we listened to. Snap Out of It - Arctic Monkeys

I still remember. It was the most memorable song. I still listen to it.

"What's been happening in your world?

What have you been up to?

I heard that you fell in love

Or near enough

I gotta tell you the truth...

I wanna grab both your shoulders and shake baby

Snap out of it (Snap out of it)

I get the feeling I left it too late, but baby

Snap out of it (Snap out of it)

If that watch don't continue to swing or the fat lady fancies having a sing

I'll be here waiting ever so patiently for you to

Snap out of it"

Remember? I love this song. Do you? I hope you do. Or did. You were my best friend. The friend who came from Japan. The person that everyone wanted to be friends with. Because you came from somewhere else. No one else was Japanese, but you didn't care. I liked that. You liked being unique. Remember in class, when my phone rang, with that song? I laughed, thinking you would too, but you didn't. I stopped, wondering what happened. I asked but you just ignored me. You just gave me a cold shoulder. Randomly. I was hurt and ignored you too.

There. Those are the reasons why. This is my decision. No one can stop me now. [Okay, I sound like an evil scientist... ] I chose my location. I chose my materials. I wrote my letters. I put the letters somewhere they might look. Maybe soon. Maybe later. Maybe now.

Location: Library [I know, seems bad, but I know a place.]

Materials: Rope, pencil, paper, eraser, phone, good luck charm [good luck charm? you may ask. yes, yes, I do need it.]

Letters: [Example]

Dear ----------,

Hello. How are you doing? Let's get to the point. I'm going to leave. Leave for a while. I know. You'll probably miss me. A lot. Or not at all. I hope you do. I'll be somewhere. Somewhere that only one person knows. I wonder who that ONE person is, you may wonder. Your welcome. Please wonder. I will miss you too. A lot. I wonder. You wonder. I hope you understand what I am doing. I'll be at the LBRY. Those who will understand will understand. h o p e f u l l y

Goodbye. Lots of love~

Mary P.