I could feel my fingers drawing itself on the rough bed I was seeking the warmth of my beloved Theodore's cozy green hoodie that I had been cuddled up in last night.But my fingers could only trace the barren land of the cold bed sheets- Theodore must of left. My eyes fluttered open and I slowly brought myself up and leaned against the wooden headboard the room was blanketed in a cold strange darkness and that darkness was just...so familiar.
It came to me I remembered the previous night everything was just so rough it felt like weights were attached to my vocal chords as I witnessed Theodore's estranged, cold-hearted behavior how we fought and he pushed me away so roughly- it felt horrible. But in the end, He came back to me and as I felt the warmth of his chest and the soft fabric of his hoodie touch my soft skin...I fell in love again. It just felt so good , like this indulgence I kept falling to...it felt like the bliss of osmanthus wine..just to have the worst hangover.
"Theodore...I want you" I sighed and slowly cracked a smile "You sure know how to make a woman go mad"
I lifted up the soft duvet and the heat of the duvet escaped in the surrounding cold wilderness of my barren room.Without Theodore it just wasn't the same without him...The softness of his lips pressing up against mine...his gentle furry hands gliding across my body it sparked something in my nervous system like a bright, white shot. His touch was just so wild it made a part of my soul light up.
The warmth...the closeness...the tension.
But as I moved my cold body to the bathroom I thought to myself, and as I opened the shower door and tilted the metal head I saw my reflection in the metal and I thought to myself. My god he's worn me down my smudged eyeliner my deep eye-bags and my the twig-like strands of my fragile hair. The stress that he has been giving me and the way hes been tearing me down- the arguments that always involved a broken object or two. Sometimes if the atmosphere was harsh as a blade I would wish to end it all. It was such a pain... but I love him and I know he loves me from the depths of his cocaine heart...
But to be honest, Theodore has been acting strange recently hes defensive, hes been s mean and hes paranoid all the time and then as I'm drying my hair a thought comes to me- Theodore must of left his phone on the desk hes been doing that recently almost...as if he's trying to distance himself from technology. I should look through his phone maybe theirs something there?
I quietly whisper to myself"Wait, what if hes cheating on me?" I've gotten good at masking my emotions now
I reassure myself "No Y/N calm yourself its fine lets see..."
I leave the shower and my body glides to the desk I sudden unease builds up in me it makes me feel under pressure just on the verge of exploding (just like a purple haired boy from a certain video game) but as my quivering hands got a hold of the phone...
Something terrible happened.
As I turned my back I saw, The FBI bust down the door and tall shady man approached cigarette lit in hand, tinted glass shades and stone cold ragged face he was dragging something behind him and I could see the green-bloodied piece of fabric he had in his hand.
"THEODORE!" I screeched a cry of agony as my man through Theodore to my feet I trembled and the knees bruised as I threw myself on to the hard, wooden floor I cradled his head in my arms his head resting on my chest. I cried uncontrollably with the sadness that blanketed my small beating heart. "WHY!" I started into the mans tinted shades but there was no emotion in the crevices of his sagging face.
The shady man spat on the floor and spoke in the gravel-like voice
"that idiot has committed 24 wars crimes covered in several different countries including, mother Russia such crimes cannot be forgiven. But our glorious leader is a kind one and he gives a choice you die or he die. Raise your hand make a signal and then you at deaths door"
I could feel my life every thing I had done and everything I worked for was about to end here... for my man who's not even good for me... but the way he held me the way he grabbed me. I was gonna die for him and his wild love. I closed my eyes and brought myself to a gentle smile If this is what must happen then so be it.
I heard a shot but as I opened my eyes I saw Theodore he with his open palm spread out bleeding on the wooden floor. My face twitched my eyes swallowed themselves in tears. And my smile quickly painted itself into gritting teeth and trembling upper lip.
"No.."
