Cleanse These Regrets

3

cw- shitty parents, not sure how to label it

***

"Hey mom, I'm gonna go to the library to find a few books for when I go back to school," Nagisa yelled from the front door.

"Okay, be home by noon," Nagisa's mother yelled back.

Nagisa looked at the clock, 'Shit, it's 10 already. I'll only have 2 hours.' Nagisa walked out the door, checking his backpack to make sure he remembered his Christmas money. After a few blocks, Nagisa made it to the library. He hurriedly walked inside, grabbing the first few educational books around his level, checked out, and left as fast as he could without disturbing anyone.

Nagisa continued on walking for a few blocks, passing various houses, small restaurants, and a pharmacy, before he made it to his destination: the thrift store. He hesitantly walked in, afraid that someone he knew would see him and mention it to his mother. He walked over to the boy's clothing rack, skimming through the shirts until he found a section of button ups. Nagisa grabbed five that looked just a little too big.

'If they're larger, it'll hide my body shape better,' He thought to himself.

Next, Nagisa went to find pants. Since he didn't have time to try them on, he just grabbed two pairs based on length. As he began walking towards the checkout, some items on the sale rack caught his eye: a vest, and a simple pair of black shoes.

I should probably get shoes considering I don't have any that weren't feminine.

Nagisa began counting up the cost of everything to make sure he had enough money before he got in line to check out.

"Hello. Will this be all for you today?" The cashier said.

Nagisa responded with a yeah and a nod. He handed over the cash before grabbing his bag of clothes and leaving.

"Well, there goes all my Christmas money," he mumbled under his breath.

He took the clothes and shoved them into the bottom of his backpack, thoroughly hiding them underneath the handful of library books he had gotten. Nagisa lifted his arm, looking at his watch just now noticing that it was 11:50. Nagisa dashed the whole way back to his house so that he wouldn't get in trouble for being late. He made it to the front door of his house just minutes before 12.

Nagisa heard his mother speaking from the living room, "xxxx honey, what books did you get at the library?"

'No. Not xxxx.'

Nagisa responded, listing off the names of the books in his bag.

"A letter came in from your school about your classes this year," Hiromi continued.

"Yeah?"

"You're in class 1-E."

"Okay."

'Okay? That's all you have to say about this? This is in no way okay. I didn't spend this much time and work getting you into a prestigious school just for you to be in the dumb class."

"I'm sorry."

'There's no use saying anything else or even trying to defend myself. That'll only make her madder.'

"Don't use that tone with me, little lady!"

'What tone? Lady?'

Apparently Nagisa's confusion showed up on their face because out of nowhere Hiromi walked over to Nagisa and slapped him across the cheek.

"I really am sorry. I'll study harder this year."

"Good girl. School starts in two days so we need to get you ready," Hiromi said.

"What do we need to do to get ready for back to school?" Nagisa asked reluctantly.

"We are going to trim your hair, get you some new skirts, and you need to do some fasting. I can't have you looking pudgy: it will reflect on my image."

"Okay!" Nagisa said in a fake excited tone.

'These two days are going to be hell.'

***

okay this chapter was super super short in comparison to future chapters (around 600 wc) (in the future they'll be closer to 2-3,000) (next chapter is 2,800 - just needs to be edited)

media rec: Her Morning Elegance by Oren Lavie (its a v good song)

ty for reading!