broken clock - pjm

1~ socially accepted?

The sound of the school bell rings in my ears as I push through the main doors with a sigh, holding the door for a second until whoever was behind me was close enough to hold it open for themselves.

I make my way down the sidewalk, the bitter cold wind burning my hands, but I continue without a care. Everything else is numb, why does it matter?

I step on the school bus, greeting the driver with a smile before returning to my original expression as I sit down and realize that I have to spend the next 40 minutes alone with my thoughts.

Trust. Something I don't have, because it's almost impossible for me to truly confide in anyone. Why did these few "friends" of mine stay close for that short amount of time even when I snapped at them? Why did it take so long for them to leave me in my own misery?

These questions invaded my mind, spreading like a disease.

Did they mean it when they said they wanted me around?

Did they really think I'm a good person at heart?

Why can't I believe a word they say?

Why couldn't I say it back when they tell me they love me?

Why am I so jealous of...

Relationships.

The most popular part of high school is finding your supposed one true love. Middle school was supposed to be your first trial.

But it wasn't mine.

They all call me out on never having a date, but what do they expect from me? Growing up with a lying piece of shit for a father never helped my case. Trust is something meant not to be broken.

But to me, the word itself is broken.

"Mind if I sit here? There aren't any open seats." I glance up at the boy standing before me. His curly black hair is shaggy and in his face, and his beautiful eyes are a deep shade of brown. I have to admit... he's cute.

"Uh, yeah. Sure." I reply, moving my backpack from its place on seat beside me to a new place on the floor before beginning to untangle my earbuds.

The boy made himself comfortable in out seat, and looked in my direction. "I'm Taehyung."

I hesitate before responding. "Allie."

He gives me a smile as the bus begins to move, and strikes up a new conversation. "You're in my grade, right? I think I've seen you around."

I sigh, giving up on my headphones and throwing them back in my backpack. "I'm a Junior."

"Oh so you must know my best friend too." he beams at me. I'm not too sure of how much Taehyung I can handle right now.

"Who?" I ask just out of curiosity.

He pulls out a phone to show a picture, and my eyes involuntarily widen. "Park Jimin."

The imagine was of the boy next to me with the school's most popular flirt, apparently his best friend, at what seemed to be a birthday party. They each had cake frosting on their faces, along with big smiles. Taehyung's curly black hair was almost all in his face, and he was looking at his best friend to his right. Jimin, on the other hand, had blonde hair, slightly shorter than Taehyung's. His smile was so wide that his eyes appeared to be closed. He looked genuinely happy.. and hot...

I look up to Taehyung after he notices how long I've looked at the picture. "You guys look happy." Was all I could choke out. I mean, it's not like I know how to smile like that.

He smirks at me before clicking his phone off and putting in his pocket. "That was Jimin's 17th birthday a few months back. In October." He studies me before asking a question. "Did you not get invited?"