ℙ𝕦𝕟𝕫𝕟𝕒𝕡 𝕊𝕞𝕦𝕥 [Discontinued]

call my bluff (baby, i can go all night)

Summary:

"Listen, asshole! I can still walk away with the whole pot," he yells, dropping his chips to the table with a quiet clatter.

"Oh yeah? Wanna bet?"

Or: Sapnap and Punz play a special game of poker.

"I knew you were bad at this, but fuck, Sap, this is pathetic."

Piles of poker chips sit before Punz, towering high enough to cover a column of his whiskey tumbler. There's no actual whiskey in it- he decided poker night would be a dry event- but he swore just holding the glass itself 'adds to the ambiance'. Through the amber mocktail, he can see Sapnap's stubborn grimace. Next to the other man's glass of 'monster on the rocks', Sapnap's small gathering of chips lay pitifully in comparison.

"Shut up, dumbass. I can make a comeback any time I want, I just wanted to give you an opportunity to win something for once." Sapnap adds under his breath, eyes trained on the deck of cards as Punz laughs.

"For once? Oh, should I pull up the Valorant VOD from last week? Maybe then we'll see who's really on a winning streak right now," Punz jeers, knocking his sneaker against Sapnap's below the round table. With a scowl, Sapnap raises, begrudgingly pushing two $5 chips forwards.

"Ooh, big bucks from a guy who hasn't even seen the turn card," Punz continues, calling the bet without so much as a blink.

"Shut the fuck up," Sapnap says, nervously tapping his index finger against the corner of his cards; it's his tell that he has something good, Punz has noticed over time. Too bad he's sure he has something better.

The fourth card is turned over onto the table and Punz lets out a sarcastic hiss. The ten of clubs stare up at the players, ten daggers aimed directly at their pockets.

"Check," Sapnap concedes, chest moving slowly with labored breaths. Gleefully, Punz knocks his knuckles against the wood to agree.

The River falls. A diamond Ace.

"Raise $20," Punz watches the tremor of Sapnap's hand. Gotcha.

"Call."

Showdowns have always been Punz's favorite part of poker- especially when he can already taste the burnt smoke of victory in his lungs.

Sapnap's cards drop face up: the ten of hearts and the Jack of clubs.

"One pair, Jack high," he notes, faux confidence clouding his voice.

It's enough to make Punz laugh again.

With an unnecessary flourish, Punz drops his cards, displaying the ten of spades and the King of hearts.

"One pair, King high."

Lavishly, Punz collects his earnings, stacking the newly-won chips neatly atop his previous pile. After three hours of play, Punz is starting to wonder why Sapnap even continues. He just doesn't know when to quit, does he?

"Fuck you," Sapnap spits, anxiously turning his final two chips between his fingers, "you're a cheater, dude. You're counting the cards or something," he grumbles, halfheartedly kicking Punz's exposed shin.

"Really, Sap? Is that the best you can do? Accuse me of 'counting cards or something'? Let me ask you something, is it really that hard for you to admit that I'm better than you? Always have been, always will be," he grins, eyes tracking the tension that builds in Sapnap's forearms, shoulders, jaw. Take it further, he tells himself, force his hand.

"Listen, asshole! I can still walk away with the whole pot," he yells, dropping his chips to the table with a quiet clatter.

"Oh yeah? Wanna bet?"