The Oath of an Oxblood

10

Over a week later, my hand still hadn't healed. I had wrapped it and washed it out, but it wasn't healing. The broad edge of the rasp wasn't intended as a cutting tool, but the force had split my skin in a thick line. When Beetle asked about it, I told her it happened while I was slicing carrots.

I would do anything for her—except tell her the truth. She didn't need to bear that secret.

As Roach worked on loosening the dirt down our row, I worked as quickly as I could to yank the carrots up, but any movement was exhausting. My hand violently complained every time I clenched it despite the makeshift bandage I had tied. I was out of breath by the simplest motion and couldn't get the wheelbarrow down to the end of the row without stopping to lower my heartrate.

Despite the chill that lingered in the air, I was sweating. I yanked hard on the carrots and managed to pull them up, nearly toppling backward with it.

"Give it a rest, Cricket," Beetle muttered, tossing another bundle onto the wheelbarrow. I stopped to catch my breath. "Are you sick?" she asked skeptically, pulling the front of her tunic over her mouth and nose.

I ignored her. I couldn't let my work fall behind. The truth was, my entire body felt shaky with a lack of strength, but I couldn't let that hurt our work. I glanced a row over and saw that we were only keeping pace with the young boys. We weren't gathering as much as we should be.

Beetle's hand landed on mine, and I flinched back.

She must have been trying to get my attention. "Cricket," Beetle repeated more loudly. "The night I came in half-dead. Since then, you haven't been the same." Her voice was accusatory. "That same night is when that foreman almost died. Did you have anything to do with it?"

My hands clutched a carrot as the memories flooded back in. The attack. The horse's foot. My decision to not heal him. His body being discovered. Terror after terror. My cowardice almost led to his death.

My bottom lip quivered, and I bit down hard on my lip to stop it. My heart felt like it was vibrating my chest. "I was in the horse stall that morning. We saw each other and...in our...conflict, one of the horses lashed out and knocked him out. I...didn't help him."

I glanced sideways at Beetle and immediately regretted it. She was furious. "What the hell were you doing there?" she asked. My head was foggy with confusion, remembering that she didn't know about my nightly excursions. Why did it matter? I though she hated foremen. Why did she care?

My brain swam with too many questions, so I decided to just ignore her and put my mind to the task in front of me. I yanked another bunch of carrots our and threw it on the cart. I went to roll it down, but Beetle pushed me off the cart and wheeled it down herself.

I grimaced at my weakness and continued pulling carrots, feeling lightheaded as I yanked as hard as I could. Roach was close to the end of the row. After a few minutes, I sat back on my heels and glanced down to watch Beetle, frantically trying to recover my energy.

Beetle was talking with one of the foremen.

A horrible betrayal and panic swarmed me like fire ants climbing an unsuspecting child's leg.

Black spot filled my vision and dizziness swirled around me. My body flushed with heat and I felt like my skull was filling with air.

"Cricket?" a small voice asked, placing a hand on my shoulder. I glanced to see Roach staring at me in concern. I hadn't realized it, but I had toppled backward and was lying in the dirt. As I blinked away the darkness, I examined Roach. She was healthier. She was still scrawny, but her face had a new vitality.

I glanced back at Beetle, who was gesturing toward Roach and me.

"Start the next row," I said sharply. More sharply than I intended. Her eyes went wide, and she scurried off to the next row. I didn't mean to be so harsh. Guilt stuffed my stomach. I couldn't let Roach be attached to me. Now that the foremen knew I had killed Tuck, they would surely be getting rid of me. I had to protect Roach. I had to protect Beetle.

Whatever I got was penalty for not saving Tuck. I deserved whatever was coming.