Drowning//Thomas Brodie-Sangster

Chapter one- Funeral

He killed him self.
He jumped to his death.
My knight in shinning amor.
The moon to my stars.
The apple to my pie.
He's gone.
Dead.

My boyfriend of 10 years is gone.
I know he was depressed. I tried so hard to keep him happy. I love him.
He loved me.
•••
I sat there. Every word people where saying sounded blurry. All I could think about is that I could have helped him. It was all my fault.

Everyone was leaving. Leaving me in an empty cemetery. I stayed there awhile thinking. Thinking about every thing. Thinking about how could I live with myself knowing he's not even living.

"I'm so sorry Dylan." I whispered. "I miss you, so much."
Why would he do this?
He said he was better.
He said he wanted to get married and have children with me.
He said he wanted to grow old with me.
He said he would never leave me.

I walked back to my apartment. Our apartment. The one we used to share.

I walked in and fell on the bed and cried. Cried and cried. Intel I fell asleep.
...
"Open the door Emma." Dylan said sadly.
"No." I said weakly.
"Please don't do this. I need you."
"No you don't. You would be better off without me, every one would."
"No they would not," he said. His voice cracking. "Without you I would have nothing."
"I want to die."
"Please...open the door."
I put the gun down. It was a really hard thing to do. I slowly got up and unlocked the door.

"Princess," Dylan said, tears streaming down his face. He grabbed my arms and pulled me into a hug. "Why on earth would you do that?" He asked, his head in the crook of my neck.
And that's when I realized.
I'm truly madly, deeply in love with Dylan O'Brien.
...
I woke up and sat straight up. It's been two days since he died. Two miserable long days.
I hate life.
I want to die.

I've decided that I was going to take my life very soon, also. I've decided that I have nothing to live for, so why I'm I even living?