The one Who Never Got Their 'Happy Ending'

I fucked up.

⚠️SH⚠️<— this is a warning. Do NOT come at me for 'not putting a warning' you have been warned.
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It was all fine, I was in the kitchen laughing with my family, everything was fun and happy at that moment. I leave the kitchen to check my phone In my bedroom for not even 5 seconds. My door was open a little bit and I could hear talking. I peeked through a bit to see my sister holding a sharpener and talking to my mom. I froze that moment because just last night I was looking for it and couldn't find it. It was like it had disappeared.
Once I heard my mom walking towards my bedroom I started to tear up. What was gonna happen next? Was I gonna get in trouble? Was I gonna be fine? Was my mom gonna be understanding? All these different questions with different endings filled my
Mind. I was scared. I tugged and moved around the ring on my pinkie finger, just waiting for that door to fully open. Once it did, I saw my mother. She immediately bursted into anger. But it didn't seem like a caring anger, it seemed more like a really bad anger. Disappointed, very disappointed anger. She was upset, angry, confused and probably many other feelings. "Ari why the hell are you cutting yourself?!" My mother had spoken. I didn't answer. I didn't want to answer. I was scared to answer. I was scared that whatever answer I had come up with and told her, would make everything way worse. I didn't know wether to open up or to stay silent. So I stayed silent. Which made her pretty mad. "Did you tell Kaitlyn about this!?" She yelled. I had a lot of pressure at the time so I nodded yes. Which was my biggest mistake of the day. Kaitlyn was one of my friends I hang out with. I only told her because I trust her. A lot. Of course I have other friends. But I only told about three people out of everyone I know, because I trust those three people with my life. She kept going on about the situation. I spaced out with her yelling so I didn't really pay much attention. I had tears running down my face. "Well, you yelling at me and trying to yell at me stop just makes me want to do it more!!"
Was what I wanted to say, but I didn't. After her yelling for a while, she left. My sister, the nice-ish one, was in the room the whole time. She looked out the door and slowly closed it. "Ari..are you cutting yourself..?" She asked me. I didn't want to answer, but she was being calm about it unlike my mom. So I nodded. "Can I see..? I wanna make sure your ok" she asked again. I shook my head no. No matter how calm and nice she was being I didn't want to show her.
"I'm fine." I answered. She stayed quiet for a moment before speaking up again. "I just wanna know your ok, I know how this feels because I got 'grounded' for doing it at your age.." she said looking at me. I didn't look at her but I could she that she was looking at me from the corner of my eye. I was looking out my window while leaning against the wall beside it. "Mom doesn't mean to show anger.
She's just scared cause she doesn't want to lose you.." she told me. I didn't believe her one bit, but I acted like I did. I just wanted this to be done and over with. But before I know it, it was. "I love you" she said before walking out and closing the door. I look at the door to make sure she actually left and closed it. I wiped my tears and sat down on my bed. I put my face in my hands and stayed like that. Why does this have to happen to me. Why did she even have to go through my room. What's gonna happen next..
The questions filled my head again over and over. I couldn't stop thinking. I was scared. I was upset. My hands stayed over my face as I let out a sigh.
I Fucked Up.