Shattering Dreams

Cinnamon (Athedred's struggle)

[Disclaimer & Content Warning: This story is purely fictional, the names, faces, and locations are used for inspirational purposes in expressing written creativity. Similarities between other stories are coincidental. This is only inspired by previous stories, i don't own anything except the words, original images were taken from pinterest. a short drabbled filled with raw emotions, please proceed with caution. ]

Offense, defence, he has to do it all.

Athedred grits down the unfairness, swallows the pain and carries on day after day, night after night. Training to be the best grisha in Ravka.

The sun summoner, a myth, a legend, what a huge expectation, what a legacy to uphold! Destined to save his country from the dreaded horrors of the darkness brought on by the darkling. His heavy breaths were ignored, the strain in his muscles endured, ignoring the melting parts of his brain, the blind spots in his visions from the brightness of the sun's rays.

He has to do it all, he has to be what is expected of him. Work hard and harder, everyone's lives are at stake. Meant to be the saviour because that's what heroes do. They save their world from peril while suffering a life of martyrdom. Athedred wished he could take a break, from the training, from the world hustling and bustling around him.

It was getting too much, repressing his emotions to fake the state of his mental health. He can go through the day with the physical strain but his mind felt scattered, the connections severed from his reality and his sanity. He could feel something bubbling up his throat, his skin tingle with a sense of anticipation. His footfalls landed harder, fists clenched at his sides as he grind his teeth together.

"It will be okay... it's okay... it's fine!" he thought to himself as he tried his best to ignore the screams of his mind, the tears threatening to spill from his eyes. Biting his lower lips to distract himself from all of it. But it was like the beating of the sun's rays against his skin, scorching the epidermis. His body halted in the middle of the clearing, free from the grishas, free from their trainers and watchful guards. Athedred took one deep breath until he could feel his lungs threatening to explode before he let it all out.

The guttural noise that was suppressed deep in his diaphragm released into the air. The heat on his skin grew high until he was practically splitting beams from every skin surface. His screams projected towards the sky as if cursing the burning star for his powers, for the responsibilities he had to carry on his shoulders, the shackles that were still tied to his ankles even when he thought he was free. Athedred screamed as much as he took a breath, his body leaning forward from the intensity of the release as if his frustrations weighed as heavy as Jupiter, pushing him down to his knees surrounded by scorched grass; black as charcoal. He took another breath and screamed until his throat turned raw, hands slapping down against the earth.

The tears burst from their dams behind his eyes, choking on his sobs. His body spent energy, letting himself fall on his side, hacking in between sobs as he rolled onto his back to stare up at the sickening blue sky. The tears finally fall free, his muscles finally relaxed and ached, his eyes flutter close pulling him down into long awaited darkness, lulling him to rest.

[FIN]