don't be HAPPIER. (namjin/namkook)

f o u r

...

The future is different.

Although, it's not different in the way that I thought it would be,
in the way i wanted it to be.

But it was for the best.

I let you be, just like you wanted,
though my desires, my heart-
they yearned(yearn) for the opposite.

Do you?

It's been years since I've seen you,
since we've spoken,
since we've met eye to eye.

I wish for your wellbeing.
I wish for your happiness.

Two years ago, I decided to try and move on.
It's hard.

It took you a mere month; probably less-
yet it took me almost a decade to even get started.
I think that shows how much you valued me
compared to how much I value you,
Seokjin.

I met a boy, a few years younger than myself.
His name is Jeongguk.

I wasn't so keen on him at first, in the romantic way.
I don't think I am now, either.

He's fixated with me, he thinks the world of me.
He would do anything for me and I know it.
This is something I admire him for,
as he reminds me of myself,
how I was(am) with you.

And so, I took it upon myself
to save him from the dark and hollow path that you so cruelly left me on-
I was like a dog that you didn't want anymore.
You threw a stick, knowing i'd go after it for you.

And then when you threw it far enough,
and I was far enough away,
you left me there alone.

I'm saving Jeongguk from that fate of distraught by doing my best to (try)love him.

And slowly enough,
it's working.

I HOPE THAT YOU CAN'T SLEEP,
KNOWING THAT I COULD BE BETTER OFF TOO.