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OMNISCIENT POV 29 May, 2022 ————————————————————
Kyaison slowly bit his lip as he looked inside of his styrofoam cup filled with cough syrup, sprite, and jolly ranchers known as "lean".
It helped his pain, it made him numb experiencing no emotion. Others would describe him as nonchalant but they didn't understand him.
They didn't know what he had gone through in the past year. The only person who understood him had left when he needed them the most.
How could she be so selfish? Left without a warning, left without a note, nor a phone call. His first everything, Ma'Ma. His reason to live was now gone without a trace why did she leave?
Was he so selfish that he didn't see her hurt or did he even care? Ma'Ma taught him everything he knew today. Helped him strive and was there at his lowest. Why didn't she allow him to be there for her?
What was she so afraid of, for him to see the real her? Kyaison put his cup down without taking a sip and got ready to start rapping in the booth.
He wanted to record at least three songs being that he hadn't dropped an album in almost a year. He slowly drowned out everything going on around him and focused on the beat Jason provided.
Kyaison had only finished one song he couldn't wrap his head around his environment at the moment. He hopped on club house interacting with fans and friends he had made recently. "Oh shit Top up in this motherfucka" he heard a rowdy girl say.
"Aye say what it is, the biggest five. Nah, i'm just jocin, but it's three in the morning i'm in the studio recording. What is y'all doing up mane?" he laughed.
After he went back on mute multiple females started talking over each other asking questions causing him to leave. "stupid ass app" he muttered.
He turned his phone off, picking up his pearled blunt. Taking a big pull being that it was his first blunt of the day his mind relaxed.
"Aye Jason can you play that one piano beat we heard yesterday?" Jason nodded his head going over to the computer playing the beat which would later be known as, "I Got This".
Kyaison mind had gone blank as he started listening to the beat. He never wrote his raps so whatever he began to lay out on the beat was what he was feeling at the current moment.
He began lightly humming, swaying his head side to side stopping himself from becoming emotional. Whenever he heard soft beats he almost instantly thought of the love of his life.
Jayla. He hated himself, had he paid more attention to her she'd be here he thought. He didn't hear her cries, he was focused on money,drugs, and bitches. Typical rapper lifestyle right? But that's another story for another time.
Later that night Kyaison left the studio he didn't get to record the song because he was entirely too emotional. Kyaison found himself crying like always this past year. He was an emotional wreck and he couldn't help it. He was a homebody now and not in the public eye anymore.
He walked to the dresser grabbing one of Jayla's shirts. He sat on the edge of the bed and bawled his eyes out. He missed her presences, her fragrance, and how she sounded when she laughed.
He laid in the middle of the bed with Ma Ma shirt laying on her pillow. "I miss you so much dawg why you had to go. Did you think about how I felt Ma'Ma? When you become so selfish?"
Kyaison eventually stopped crying getting up to go get their picture book. They put it together for when they decided to have kids and show them how in-love their parents were.
Kyaison was crying more than usual due to the fact that their four year anniversary was coming up. Kentrell got cut out of thoughts by his phone ringing, "Wassup Jason"
"Hey Top man umm when do you think you're going to be ready to record that song? I say we should start tomorrow so we can finish just in time for next Saturday"
"We could start tomorrow I ain't tripping just call me tomorrow or some shit, you know what it is." Kyaison sighed wiping his tears.
"Alright man"
Kyaison kept looking over the picture book feeling himself get tired. "I love you Ma'Ma to the moon and back" he said as he looked out of the window at the mountains in the city of Salt Lake.
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"Loving the lights in the city... They make me feel bigger they make me feel better"
Ps: This is really short, trust me I know! Remember it's just a prologue, the chapters are going to get longer I promise.
