Functional

8. Why Are We So Comfortable in Our Gullibility?

He is a good man.  There are other men she knows, works with, manipulates.  But she could never manipulate him.  He believes in what they are doing, and she is not a means to reach an end for him.  It is disconcerting to realize that he cannot resist her, even against his better judgment.  How meaningful this is to her, since he knew her before she became such a consummate liar.  He knows her, and loves her, and risks all that is important to him to be with her.  She finds it very difficult to be away from him, to do missions with others.  She doesn’t know his name or where he comes from (he is NOT Russian), but she knows that no one else could love her so simply.  Her job is filled with lies and bargains and using each other, but he does none of these things.  He is a destructive force when unleashed, but his tactics are straight forward and somehow honest in spite of everything.

She wishes that she were more like him, that she had been groomed for this, like he was.  Her assignments are different, her training different.  Her skills are put to good use infiltrating and charming their enemies.  He can infiltrate, but no one would ever feel comfortable around him.  Except for her.  Others are disturbed, or at least put on edge, by his single-mindedness and lack of emotional reactions.  Perhaps it is because she grows tired of all the games she must play in the company of anyone else, but she enjoys the peacefulness of time spent with him, where she doesn’t have to remember who to be.  She is Natalia, and he is the Soldier, and nothing else matters.

Something wakes her, and she tightens her grip on the cool metal arm wrapped around her waist.  Listening carefully, she moves out of his embrace and pads toward the window, wrapping a robe around herself as she does so.  In the pocket of the robe is a pistol, and she pulls it out, checking the safety.  The shadows move just outside in a way that does not seem natural, and she steels herself for an attack, reaching back to wake the Soldier.

Suddenly, a figure drops into view and she blinks in surprise.  It is Yelena.  Her fellow Widow beckons almost frantically, glancing behind her.  Natalia walks to the window and opens it slowly.  “What are you doing here?” she hisses.

“You must come with me, immediately,” Yelena replies, moving out of the way.

“Why?”

“I can’t tell you here, but it’s important.  Please, Natalia,” the woman begs, looking afraid.  It is startling to hear that name again, from someone besides the Soldier.

“Alright, let me get dressed.”  Natalia can tell this is not part of the plan, but Yelena doesn’t protest while she gathers her things and gets ready quickly.  She is grateful that her comrade does not comment on the presence of the Soldier in what is clearly her bed.  When she is prepared, she bends to kiss him gently on the forehead, then follows Yelena out the window.

The mission did not seem like it couldn’t have waited until morning, but Natalia goes along with it anyway.  It is not her job to question such things.  It is a simple assassination, but she can see why Yelena would prefer not to undertake it alone.  There were a lot of bodyguards and a distraction is always appreciated.  When the target is dead, Natalia returns to the apartment where she left the Soldier.  She is startled to find it empty, devoid of any hint of either her presence or his.  Troubled, she supposes she has no choice but to return to base.

She debriefs her superiors on both of the missions.  Despite her curiosity, she knows this is not the time to question what happened to him.  When she is finally released from duties and trainings, some days later, she goes to his chamber and is shocked to find it completely empty.  The walls are bare and there is not even a hint that he lived here for years.  Against her instincts, she rushes out of the room in search of someone in charge.  Sokolov is gone, the people she talked to earlier are not known to her.  Everyone she asks looks at her as though she has gone insane.  Her fitness for duty is questioned.  She endures psychological evaluations.  She is moved to another facility.  Her questions about the Widow program itself are ignored, and there is no sign, no hint or whisper, of her former comrades.  Or of him.  Eventually, she stops asking.