Harry's POV
"Still here?"
"I'm not leaving", I say to him without changing any eye contact.
I've been here since the accident happened a few days ago. The fear is too great to just leave her here alone.
We have arranged a large room with a beautiful view for her, so when she's gonna wake up, the first thing she'll see isn't just a white wall. What I don't like about hospitals is everything's white and so clean. Even the lights have this cold effect on everything. And the smell. God, I hate this disinfected hospital odour. If I could I would take her back to England, but the doctors say she's not yet stable enough to transport.
It's only been a few days since the accident but it feels like weeks since the last time I got to see her beautiful ocean blue eyes. These eyes are to dream of. You get lost in them. I think that's one of her trademarks, besides all the birthmarks. Even now she looks utterly gorgeous with her brown hair. Ugh, how much I would do to take her back to the light.
"It's been days", Louis says.
"I'm not leaving Louis," I shake my head and squeeze her hand harder, "Gen needs me."
Louis takes a deep breath, "We can do nothing for her." Tears build up in my eyes and soon every single one is leaving my eye. I know that. I know that we can do nothing for her but what else am I supposed to do. To go on and live my life. To pretend everything is alright. I almost killed her and these people that crashed into our car are still out there. What if they'll come back and end her as they planned.
"It's not fair!" I look at her hand locked in mine. Her nails are green kinda like my eyes and I love her for that. Green was never a colour I like, but as soon as I knew it was her favourite, it was mine too. Everywhere I look I see her in something. She's everywhere but nowhere. She turned me into a fucking softy. From the bad boy to the total lover boy in a few weeks. The power she has over me.
"I messed up. She doesn't deserve this." As I glance up at her face I remember every single moment I had with her. Every minute which I did not cherish enough. She has such a pure heart and I didn't have enough time to love it. Why can't she just open her eyes for us? She has to fight against this tiredness and open her damn blue eyes.
"It's not your fault", Louis takes a step closer to me and takes a seat, in the chair right next to her hospital bed. "Harry look at you. You're suffering. You haven't properly eaten in days and when was the last time you slept?"
"You know, the night the accident happened, I had a plan for the two of us. I wanted to tell her exactly how I feel and for the first time, I wanted to open up", with my hand I wipe every teardrop that leaves my eye, "I wanted to take her in my arms and say I'll never leave your side... but I couldn't."
"Harry you need some rest, you haven't been sleeping at all."
"I don't need a babysitter. I don't need someone who takes note of how much I sleep or how much I eat. Where's the point anyway!" I shout at him.
Louis jumps up from his chair. "Why don't you get that I'm just looking out for you!"
"I don't need you to look out for me, I don't need anyone!" I now yell at him. Letting go of her hand as I stand up. At the same time, the other boys are coming in.
"Hello, lads, what party is going on in here?" Niall smiles, obviously trying to break the tension in the room. Liam punches him with his elbow in Niall's stomach. "Ouch, what was that for?"
"For you being a dick!" Liam whispers annoyed.
Niall has always been the one who's optimistic that everything's gonna be alright and he just jokes about it a lot. He kinda brings a joke everywhere he goes. Always has been a sunny boy and I hope for him, he always will.
"I'm gonna grab a coffee," I say, knocking Louis' shoulder as I walk out of her room. All he does is sigh and shake his head.
I walk down the halls to the coffee machine and let out an espresso.
I remember when I brought Gen a coffee as an apology. Since the day I met her, I tried to keep my fences up. I didn't want to get close to anyone because you only get hurt and see where we are now. Am I regretting letting her this close to me? Would she be alright if we never entered her life? Yes of course she would. Without us, she would've never been in this much danger. She deserves so much more than she'll ever get with me.
As my mind jumps from thought to thought the doctor walks into her room. I grab the coffee and stride to Gen's room.
"I'm sorry but there is nothing else we can try to bring her out of the coma," Dr Welling says, "Sometimes it happens that a patient wakes up on its own but nobody knows when or if she ever will." he pauses for a moment and continues, "If she ever wakes up again, there is a high chance that she will have large memory gaps due to her craniocerebral trauma and will not be able to remember moments or people. You have to be aware of that."
"She'll wake up", I say while leaning at the door frame. Everybody's head turns to me. Louis looks at me like I'm a lost cause, he gives me his sad puppy eyes. While Niall and Liam's gazes are empty, they don't know what to think. "She'll wake up and we'll be gone," I say without any emotions. Did I think this through? Nope, but I do think it's the right decision. It's the only way, she's gonna be safe. I'll have security guards in front of her room so when these dudes come to kill her before I kill them, she'll be protected.
"That's bullshit Harry, you love her!" Niall hisses.
"You see where this "love" brought her?" I speak in this dismissive tone. Leaving her here fucking hurts. I deserve this pain more than she does.
After a long pause, Dr Welling asks, "Do you know where her family is? I have to ask them a few things," he looks at every one of us. Nobody knows if she got family. We never saw them.
"She doesn't have any." We turn our heads and see Mara standing next to me, "We're her only family."
"I'm gonna sign everything you need," she tells him. I trust Mara. She knows Gen the longest and she wouldn't give up on her. Not now. So she and Dr Welling walk out of the room. I follow right behind them.
"We're gonna do this together," I take her hand. I always liked her and now she's with Louis I'm gonna protect her. Losing a best friend isn't easy for her. She squeezes my hand and gives me a shy smile. As we read through every page and sign wherever we have to after a few minutes we're finally done. Fortunately, we agreed. We will leave her in here and wait until she wakes up, no machine will be switched off before then. "She will wake up", Mara says while tears stream down her face. I brush them away with my thumb and take her in my arms. "Yes, she will wake up and you will be there for her," I hug her tighter and slowly she calms down. I explain to her that we're gonna leave in a few days, find these people that tried to kill Gen and me and then we're gonna continue to live our life. "And you'll not tell her where we went, just say we left and that's all you know," I say to her in a strong voice, "If she doesn't remember us, make sure it stays that way." I try to turn into the bad boy I was for this moment, to let Mara know what she has to do, „And take her back to the light for us."
