Realityholic

“Hi, my name is Mark Scoles and I'm a recovering reality addict.”

I didn't know what else to do, so I sat back down. I suddenly became very interested in the floor. The first thing I noticed was the fact I had somehow smeared my new shoes with some gross brown stuff on the way in. I hoped it was mud.

“Hello Mark,” the room of a mere four people echoed back to me.

“Mmh.” I tried discretely rubbing the stain off my shoes and onto the carpet. The tanned goatee'd man clapped his hands together, cleared his throat and began to speak again.

“Well, now that we've all gathered, why don't we all to a little fun activity to get acquainted with each other a little better?”

No one said anything.

“I'll take that as a yes,” he beamed from ear to ear. “First of all, grab a partner, somebody you don't know very well!”

I gave a groggy little groan and stood back up. I glanced around, digesting the situation I had caught myself in. I couldn't be bothered remembering their names, but I could see that the thin cross faced lady had paired up with the other cross faced lady, and the midget guy in the suit was now with the fatty wearing sunglasses. The problem with having five people is that there is always someone left out – and in this case, me. I gave a careless shrug and tried to make it look like I didn't mind. Honestly, I didn't want to come here in the first place.

The goatee-man noticed I was alone and trotted over to me expectantly.

“Oh dear,” he boomed loudly. “Anyone willing to let Mark Scones join into their group? Become a little trio?”

“Actually,” I excused myself, “It's Mark Scoles.”

But before anyone could reply, he slammed his hand onto my shoulder, making me give a startled jump. “Well, in that case, I suppose you'll have to work with me!” He ruffled my blonde hair fondly. I cringed.

“Mr Alwyn, what are you intending for us to do now?” the first cross faced lady pursed her lips prudently.

Alwyn, the goatee-man, laughed heartily.

“Oh, just some warm ups until we get to the real thing. Do any of you know how time works?”

The lady seemed a bit taken aback.

“What on earth has that got to do with anything?”

“Just answer my question, lady. Do you know how time works?”

“Why, no one does,” she blubbered. “So far, scientists have only determined that it strongly revolves around time, space and I suspect a little bit about the speed of light.”

“Close enough. But did you know that some people believe that time doesn't really exist? In fact, some religion even claim it to be no more than a mere unreal illusion. I mean, think about it – how can you be sure that time, motion and change are really circling around us right this minute? Where's your proof? You came to this rehabilitation wanting to venture more into the imaginary world, yet you very well might already be neck deep in it. Am I making your head spin yet?”

“Not exactly,” she replied coldly. I just stared at Alwyn in utter confusion.

“Good, because that's not even the beginning of it. Anyway, the reason I brought up time was because of this theory some people have.” He leaned forward into the group of serious looking people, hand still on my shoulder. I tried to shrug it off. “I think you will find it rather interesting.”

“Hey, when does this thing end?” I questioned him. “Because I have to get back for dinner, and I--”

“Just listen! Now, Mildred was right, no one really knows how time works. But some people believe that it's like a big cycle, a circle in space or something. Like, if you get to the end of time, you'll just end up right back at the beginning of it.”

“What? So if time runs out, we'll end up back in that whole BC crap? No offence, but I don't want to die and end up as an ancient Greek.” My eyes goggled at his bearded face in disbelief. No one payed any attention to me.

“Nonsense. Time doesn't run out,” Mildred scoffed.

“You didn't let me finish,” Alwyn pointed out. Touché, I thought. “I, for one, do not believe in this theory either. But what if it didn't just finish with time? What if that could be used elsewhere?” Alfwyn was glancing round at the small group, eyes gleaming, not seeming to care that we hadn't the slightest idea what was going on. “For instance, maybe if you fall out of this world, you will end up in a hypothetical one.”

Someone piped up from the crowd, I think it was the short well dressed man.

“Is this about religion? I'll have you know, if this is going to bash my faith right now, I am leaving!”

“No, no! Not at all!” Alwyn sighed. “I'm not talking about reincarnation or anything. What I'm talking about is reality. That's why you came here, isn't it? You were all too serious. You needed some imagination. Tell me, my good sir, are you employed?”

“Me? I'm a funeral dictator. It's a very highly respected job, thank you very much. In fact, I used to be the headmaster at a private boarding school! May I enquire your asking?” The short man straightened his black tie stiffly.

“Doesn't matter, you've said enough,” Alwyn scoffed. “Look, we're running short of time so I'll explain it later. You people need some serious help. Now, I want you to go home and pack. Pack for a long trip. Like, a really REALLY long trip.”

Before we could even protest, Alwyn put his arm around our shoulders (he was really quite the large man) and pushed us out the door. “Our second meeting is next week at three pm. Have fun!”

“Wait, what?!” I tried to hop back inside. “Packing for a long trip? Where are we going?!”

Completely ignoring my question, Alwyn paused and tilted his head, stroking his goatee.

“Say, Mark Scones, I have a question for you. Why are you in this group? You seem far too...boring for such a young boy. Everyone else here happens to be an adult.”

“My, um, dad made me. How come we have to pack? Are we going somewhere? And did you just call me boring?”

Bang. He slammed the door in my face. The rest of the people seemed just as shocked as me. But they were adults! I was the thirteen year old boy who still lived with his grouchy parents, and I suspected that they wouldn't let me go camping with some suspicious bearded man and his friends. I banged on the door again. “Let me in!”

Four minutes later and I gave up with a sigh. This thing was useless. Useless, bonkers and pointless.

So I went home to get dinner.