So i like moved into this place after my house got arsoned. it burned, crashed, broke, busted and bursted and eventually died.
So I knew I had to leave. i couldnt just stay in a place where there was no tv, like could you imagine.
oh i fogor to mentin. im elizabethany asstor. my life has been a series of doors in my face, until suddenly I bumped into youuu. wait, wrong story.
anyway. i was gliding on my figure skates with wheels when i saw this cute little ancient looking town. it had no tv like are you friken kidding me. anyway.
i went to the biggest house because obviously thats where i needed to live from now on be cause if you didnt know i am the 16,837th princess of suckmybussyland. i need to be treated accordingly.
i knocked on the door with my newly manicured hands that i bought when i was on my journey. they were literally so cheap! free even. the hands even came with it too.
so anyway. this cute freckled boy came to me and started blushing like obviously who wouldnt. because im the princess of like everything and im the most amazing person anyone can ever meet ever.
and then, like he was hynotized by my be-yooty, he let me inside. then, every single person stared at me and blushed. they were literally so inlove with me. they soooo wanted to be with me.
so to break the silence by saying. "guys I know you love me so lets do this little tradition from the country which i basically own. its where you suck each others bussies."
they all nodded because of my brilliant idea and we all went to the town sqare and celebrated my arrival. this cute boy named cumilo was so cute tho. my literal daddy.
"and thats how i met your father kids."
