Taking Chances For You

chapter 1

When the tables turn and Maddie has no one to turn to, and she feels like her life is falling apart, what will save her. Maddie has always felt left out, between not having a relationship with her mom and mean kids around her, she don't know whom to talk to. Maddie is more mature than most teens her age,, and she doesn't like things kids her age does. She is always a teacher's pet, and occasionally she has an attitude. As everything starts falling apart, she finds joy in music, poetry, reading, writing, and celebrities. Having something to cling to that cant be lost or broken is great, Maddie has music and celebrities to help her. Her family don't understand why she has obsessions as they call it, but truly it's not obsessions. It's a way of covering for the lack of motherly love her mother gave her. All these harmless things are ways to cope with her feelings, such has feeling hopeless, and lonely. Maddie sees it as if the celebrity don't know her, how could they leave her or criticize her? When it feels like you're invisible to the whole world including family it's hard, Maddie can't help what she feels, she doesn't understand why she feels this way. Her mother has done nothing but use her and after finally letting her mom go, Maddie just falls deeper into sadness and sorrow. She tries so hard to push the thoughts away of suicide, no matter how hard she tries, she can't stop thinking about ending it all.  All she wants is for these feelings and pain to end, she wants to be happy again. Everyone keeps telling her to let go of the past but it's hard to, she misses her mom, she misses feeling wanted, she misses being happy, and most of all she misses having someone to talk to and being able to trust people. Maybe all she needs is to let go, maybe if she lets go and leaves her mom alone and stops thinking about her, she will feel better. She blocks her mom on all social media and throws away everything that ties her to her mom. She stops being a teacher's pet and gives up on being friends with anyone. Furthermore, she meets this boy and becomes friends with him, he asks her out and she says yes, thinking it's going to be a normal relationship like all the other girls in her school. Turns out it was all fake, Robin takes advantage of her, at first, she don't think nothing about it. Maddie told herself it was just teen boys, It's how they act, teens kiss all the time, teens talk sexual to each other. They normally do, but this was different, this was forced, it wasn't normal, but she thought it was. She got on the bus one morning and something was different about Robin, there was a look in his eyes, that did not seem right. She always got on before robin,, so she went to the very back because it was always quieter and no one was ever back there until close to the end of the bus ride. Robin got on and sat on the outside of the seat like normal,, but soon his hand was on her knee. She was wearing a pink dress, and it was not provocative at all, no skin was shown above the knee and no shoulders or cleavage. He asked her if he could touch her and like normal she disagreed, he moved his hand further up and with his other hand grabbed hers and put it on his crotch. He put his hands in her underwear and began to make circular motions. Maddie started to cry and say no over and over again, but Robin did not stop, Robin kept going. The bus came to a stop and a boy was coming all the way to the back. Robin quickly moved his hand and acted normal. Maddie turned towards the window and continued to cry, I knew my dress was too much, this is all my fault, she told herself. She let it go, when she got home robin came to her house and asked her to come over, she thought nothing of it and went with him. As soon as the door closed his hands were all over her, he started to rub his crotch against hers, Maddie froze and had tears streaming down her face. Soon a car pulled up, once again he stopped and moved away from her, he looked out the window and his sighed. He explained that his mom would be home soon and that she needed to leave. Maddie rushed out the door crying and went home, her parents aren't home, she went straight to the bathroom and turned the water on scalding hot and took a shower. She scrubbed and burnt her body and until it was bloody red. She was slowly giving up, she wrote a suicide note and grabbed the pills, she poured the pills into her hand and grabbed the water beside her bed. I'm doing this, she said, I can't keep just being nothing. Before she could take the whole bottle of pills she started crying, I can't leave my sisters behind, I have to keep fighting, she thought, I have to do it for them. She stopped talking to the boy, she stayed as far away from him as possible, she was cautious when going outside. She finally moved meaning she was free from those chains, this time when she moved she met someone, someone special