Campus Days

Payton Neil

We all develop a crush on someone at different phases in life. Celebrity crush, childhood crush, high school crush, a crush on someone at work, a crush on a distant relative, a crush on someone you met in social media, a crush on your neighbor, it comes in different forms and times. Crush is not a deep or intimate feeling but it sure does make you feel giddy when that certain someone notices you and sometimes it's a start to something beautiful. Have you witnessed or been the victim of a situation where you develop a crush on someone because of your friend's matchmaking and constant teasing. Poor Aurora, our dear Auri, became the victim of Phoenix, Uriah, and me.

One day before lectures started as the four of us were seated in the last row of the right side - the first section, we were able to see who was entering and leaving if we turn back. Quiet bored with nothing to do even on social media the four of us were looking at the door watching batchmates rushing in and leaving to roam about till the lecturer arrives. Everyone gave us weird looks. That's when we noticed a guy walking in but what really shocked us was that he kept looking at Auri and his line of sight didn't move away from her. Auri blushed and turned to face the front, while the three of us started teasing her and shipping the two together. Annoyed she told us to stop and we went back to the daily routine. 

Curiosity won over sanity. We gathered information about this guy from other batchmates we knew.

Payton Neil aka Pay was the quietest and most distant guy in the entire batch, comes from a town out of the city. He was 5'7 in height (I have an obsession with estimating everyone's height, bare with me guys), had lean muscles but short legs than his upper body and maintained a stiff posture, was freckled and had a cropped haircut. You wouldn't say he is handsome but he did have a certain charm of his own yet was always aloof and seemed to be in a sad or grumpy mood. Rarely did we catch him smiling. He only attended lectures for the first two semesters, no idea what happened to him after the second-semester exams. 

Even though a friend pleads you to stop teasing or matchmaking them with someone when you are a best friend as close as a sibling, you don't listen to their pleadings, do you? NOPE. We may have spent time with each other for only a month or two but this time was all it took for us to get as close as siblings are.

We would tease Auri every chance we get. When Pay enters into the lecture hall we say: "He is here, your guy is here", as he leaves: "Oh no, he is leaving before us, quick let's try to catch up with him", during the breaks: "Auri, where's your guy?", during the lecture one of us would turn back like as if we are looking for our friend seated in the back: "He is seated in the row second two last", "he is seated next to Danny", "Shoot, he saw he is looking at you". We would report back to headquarters and update Auri. Poor Auri had a hard time shushing us. But our non-stop teasing did change her feelings and for the first time in her life, she had a crush on a guy. She went to an all-girls school, therefore, the campus environment was very new to her and our teasing affected her too. Thus bloomed a new crush in her heart to dear grumpy Payton.

Auri and I would stay back at the campus for two more hours after lectures, waiting for our private transport services. Phoenix and Uri traveled by public transportation so they would leave as soon as the lectures were dismissed to catch the next bus home. The canteen and the lobby were where we pass time and would go for a walk around campus when sitting for too long gets uncomfortable.

One fine day as we were seated in the canteen passing the time, Payton sat down one or two tables away. My opinion about him changed. This dude eats like he's been starved for days and has no table manners, I hate that. Auri, however, didn't seem too bothered with it. He would eat one snack fast and messy and rush to order the next snack. This would continue till his vehicle arrives to pick him up. Yet, I clicked a pic of the guy sneakily to tease Auri further.

When there is a heavy rain shower, our campus floods. On a heavy rainy day, our car park was flooded with dirty muddy rainwater, we weren't able to see the tires of the vans parked, that was how high the flood was that day, crossing the car park was a challenge. Auri got her new favorite pair of shoes completely spoilt and damaged in the flood. On this day, Payton took a step forward in this crush phase of theirs and stood beside me not to make it too obvious or awkward for Auri. Who was he trying to kid? At least he could have hid that goofy smile to make it less obvious.

After this incident, Auri went on a FaceBook search looking for Payton Neil. Once she found the guy among various other Payton's, Auri liked his recent profile pic - a bathroom selfie. Upon receiving the FB notification that Aurora Scott has liked your profile picture, he took it upon himself to start up a messenger chat. A few messenger chats later, the two agreed to meet after lectures on campus appointing me as the official third wheel.

Shouldn't it be awkward for the third wheel? Why were these two awkward with each other? Didn't they agree to drag me along? It was not my idea I would never willing be the third wheel, that's the worst. Comfortable to chat on social media but awkward to speak face-to-face. Uncomfortable with their awkwardness I had my head bent down into my phone scrolling FaceBook that played a better cupid than us to Auri and Pay.

A few minutes that seemed like hours to me passed and after a walk around campus Auri and Pay got on to a common topic and had a heartfelt chat. Auri then asked the question that she was dying to ask from Pay for a very long time. "Pay, you are so nice to speak with. But why are you always quiet during the lecture hours and seem to be distant with everyone?". Pay went silent. Sensing the shift I looked up at the duo, Pay seemed too hesitant to speak about this topic in front of me. "Don't worry I am not listening to you guys, my focus is on FB memes, your secret is safe, carry on". He still seemed hesitant, I shrugged my shoulders and went back to my FB feed.

Pay didn't answer Auri, instead, he diverted her attention to another conversation. After reaching our homes Pay had messaged Auri on WhatsApp, now that he had her phone number, that my presence had him feel insecure to share personal information. Payton was diagnosed by his psychiatrist with depression as a result of being bullied at school. He was not comfortable sharing this with me, he felt embarrassed to be taking anti-depressants and would spend up to 4 hours in the gym. 

This information made Auri unsure about their relationship. It is not everyone's cup of tea to deal with someone who is having a hard time with depression, not Auri especially after witnessing her cousin go through depression too. However, they did continue to chat with each other. We would capture moments Auri's on the phone with Pay in video and would tease her for her hour-long phone calls. Skeptic about her relationship with Pay Auri always made sure they never went beyond friendly phone conversations. Pay wouldn't join Auri at the campus he chose to sit by himself and only converse through phone calls and chats when he is in the comforts of his home. Distracted with these newfound feelings and excitement Auri lagged in her academics. She only realized this at the end of the third semester a few months after she lost contact with Pay all of a sudden. We have to understand that not everything is here to stay forever and it did take Auri a few months to come out of this haze and we felt guilty as we too had a part in what happened, Auri responded only because we kept teasing her. 

After that episode, we made a mental point to never evoke anyone's feelings without their consent first and no teasing, shipping, or match-making unless there is a positive response from both sides.