𝐄𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐇𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 (𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐎𝐧𝐞.)

Before The Games

I'm quickly dragged into a room to say goodbyes. I trace my hand against the soft, velvety couch and hold back instant tears. The only person who appears is Marcus. He rushes to me, as his arms completely engulf me. I wish I could pause time, Stay this way forever, and not go into the games. Yet I know, this is not how reality works.. A white uniformed man comments, "It's time to go." I suddenly hear a whisper in my ear, from Marcus. "I'm sorry, Harley. Please, try," within a heartbeat, the arms which stopped me from sobbing were gone. I stared down, and watched as a tear landed on the white-tiled floor.

We are brought onto a train, and I'm sat next to Finnick. I feel a headache coming on, as i let my head fall back into the comforting chair i'm in. I start to cry silently, and bury my face in my arms. I can't cry, I can't show him I'm weak! Yet, I couldn't help it. My mother hadn't visited me even.. I feel tears rush down my cheeks, forming black spots under my eyes. I gasp for air, turning farther away from Finnick. "Do you need anything? A tissue?" I hear him ask. I'm suddenly dumbfounded, as I feel useless, and weak. I looked at him clearly, revealing the darkness which had formed under my eyes. I wipe my tears, smearing it like paint. I look at him, my eyes clouded with sadness. I simply nod, "A- A tissue would be nice." I say, trying to sound firm. My mind wanders to my mother, how she's taking the news.. How she was too lazy to attend, and now how I may never see her again. I long to tell her about how I forgive her, how I understand how painful it was for her. Yet, It's too late for that now. My mind is foggy, as I realize I could use a hug. "Anything particular? Than this?" I watch groggily as he waves his hand around. I stifle a short-lived laugh, knowing this must be his way of coping. "Are you okay?" My voice breaks into a soft, rhythmic tone. "Probably Not. No." I sigh, "Maybe we could both use a hug," I shrug, just wanting to curl up and never awake. "Maybe we do," I watched as he stood up, Opening his arms. I search his face, finding nothing but desire. I unsteadily stand, embracing myself in his arms. I suddenly start sobbing again, digging my head into him. I hug him firmly, holding on as if this is the last hug I will get, ever. I feel soothed, as he runs his hand softly along my back. I suddenly pull out of his grasp, gasping. "Im- Im so sorry," I burst out, feeling embarrassed. "We can't always win, can we?" I watched him smile, as I suddenly felt as though we were being watched. And, we were. Katniss and Peeta are smiling from behind us. I turn around, feeling even more embarrassed. I desperately wipe off the dark mascara painted below my eyes. "I- Hello, Mr. And Mrs. Everdeen.." I nod respectfully. "Hello, Harley." Peeta says firmly, gazing at his son, clearly searching for an explanation. "We all need a hug sometimes." I hear Finnick murmur. I watch as Katniss eyes me, and laughs. I feel somewhat offended, as I took it the wrong way. I let my head droop downward, again trying to wipe off the black below my eyes. I nod to them, "I should get some rest." I'm honestly just trying to get away from these people. "Right, you should." Peeta nods. "You too, Finnick." I hear Katniss order. I look to Finnick, and wave my hand, Inviting him to walk with me.

We walk down the hall, as I desperately wait for Finnick to say something. Instead, I improvise, joking. "So, you have any idea where we're going??" I smile, looking at him. "Zero. I figured you did," He says. I listen to his short laugh, which brings me to smile. "I think it's down the hall, Each of our rooms on opposite sides." I point, "You go that way. I'll go this way," I motion with my head toward the opposite side of the hall, and wince with pain as my headache grows worse. I fall into the wall, resting there for a bit as I feel I might pass out. I place my hand on my head, feeling it burning hot. I close my eyes, wishing this stupid migraine would just go away.

"Uh- uh-" He walks toward me, "Do you need an adult or something? Lithel, maybe?" He asks nervously, as I shake my head absently. I had always been independent. "I-Ill be fine. I never had anyone taking care of me, and don't need it now." I sighed as the pain increased at a rapid level. "Well, are you going to sit there all night?" I hear him say. I shake my head , Using the wall for support as I walk almost blindly toward the hall. I feel a warm object touch my hand, as I don't object Finnick leads me toward my room. I let him help me to my bed, and he leaves. I feel an eerie emptiness creep over me, as I soon doze off.

I wake up normally, and walk to get out of bed. I open the door, seeing a bloodbath. Ripe, vivid slaughter. I see someone running toward me carrying a heavy mace, and start to breathe heavily, looking desperately for something to defend myself. Before they reach me, I actually wake up this time. I sit up in my bed, panting. My dark hair is ruffled, and the dress I slept in is worn. I feel something sharp on my back, as I feel around I find a golden locket. My brows furrow, as confusion floods against horror. I pry open the locket, to see a picture of my mother, father, and me. I look at my fathers strong build, his dark hair complimented his white clothes. Then I looked at my mother, she looked young, blonde-haired, and had a slim build. Then I look to myself. I was about five in the picture, where my hair was lighter and shorter, I wore a beautiful pink blouse. I smile, coming to the conclusion Marcus had slipped it to me. I look at the photo of my family, gripping the locket as if it were my only source of hope..

I drowsily get up, heading through the halls to get my breakfast. I see that I'm the first to join the table. I eagerly wait for Finnick, or Peeta to join me before I begin to eat. To my pleasure, Finnick enters. He sits thoughtfully across from me, "You, You alright?" He asks softly. I smile, nodding. "Thank you, For last night." I look down, somewhat embarrassed. I admire the beautiful breakfast laid in front of us, fluffed pancakes dripping with syrup, and fresh scrambled eggs. "Have you seen anybody else up, yet?" He asks, sounding shy. As I'm about to shake my head, Katniss and Peeta appear through the door, looking at us. I sense Katniss specifically staring at me, as I understand why. She doesn't like how close me and her son are, maybe she thinks I'm using him. I look to Katniss, confirming the theory she had been staring at me. "Come join us, Please." I nod respectfully to my Mentors. Katniss eyes me, beginning to sit down. I watch as everyone begins to eat, yet I don't touch my food. I watch politely as everyone else eats, looking down to my locket once more. The small golden chain clinks as I open it , clasping it close to my chest. I watch as Finnick practically eats his plate, and giggle softly. I smile widely, "Finnick. You- You have a bit of something on your face-" I point to his upper lip, as he looks confused. "What?" He quickly grabs a napkin, wiping all over his face except for where the syrup was. I walk over, my plate clanking as I stand. I feel Peeta and Katniss's eyes on me as I grab a napkin and wipe above Finnick's lip. I whisper, "Was it that hard?" "Yes, very much so." I laugh as he playfully shoves me, as I nudge his arm, I hear an insult from Katniss. "Why are you two getting so.. 'Buddy Buddy?' You realize you will have to kill each other." I look at Katniss, suddenly feeling overwhelmed by new sadness.
She's right. I would have to lose him, to win. I bluntly sit up, clanking the plates as I quickly run to my room.

It had been three days, as now only the brisk moonlight shone through my window. Tommorow morning we would go into the games. Although my assessment had come back as a score of Ten, i still felt as though i had no chance. So, that night i made the worst decision of my life..