Berry punch drinking telegram

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I really love my Alcohol
It makes me really Queer
I start myself with Bourbon
Wash it down with some cheap beer
And then I chug some Red Wine
Drinking Vodka is not enough
Don't give me Gin and Tonic
Man that drink is pussy stuff
Then I go for some Jack Daniels
But I add a little twist
I throw some Absynthe in the cup
To make the bestest mix
Now I'm starting to feel the buzz
But I'm still a ways away
Man I better drink this Green Label
Six glasses makes my day
Now I think it's safe to say
That I'm no longer in a funk *hic*
Cause I've drunk enough to kill a horse
I'm finally ******* drunk! *thud*

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