flowers (not original)

why?

Kenma's pov

I never thought I'd find myself in such a situation. I have always been of the opinion that I am quite an apathetic person. I certainly never expected that something of such big size could arise with in me that it would cause an up ar.

But maybe it's better that I go back at least a few weeks. Half of the summer vacation had already passed before the spring break. Nekomata, our coach, had organized, as every year, a week-long retreat inviting as always the Fukurodani Academy group composed of Ubugawa, Shinzen, Fukurodani itself and us, Nekoma High. But this year, unlike of the others, the old Nekomata had invited Karasuno to join us, who after our training match that winter had affected the old coach's expectations so much that it led them to improve for a decisive battle called "Battle of the landfill" I really didn't feel like doing these extra workouts. I have never liked to work hard.

Luckily for me, this was supposed to be the last day of retreat. I was blissfully asleep on my futon, the closed curtains of the dormitory that I shared with my teammates was carefully closed and not a single ray of sunshine was missed. I hadn't slept much that night. I couldn't stop thinking about what was going on. Ever since Karasuno joined us, things were taking a turn for the worse for me.

Yes, they looked less fit than last winter's game, but it's not volleyball that I'm worried about. Kuroo could no longer take his eyes off the grumpy middle blocker with the obnoxious face of crows. That four-eyed blond, as tall as a building. Number 11, Tsukishima Kei. From the first day Kuroo had set eyes on him, I had made inquiries with Shoyou's help about it. From what the orange-haired boy told me, Tsukishima was not at all friendly, grumpy with everyone and sometimes apathetic.

Almost worse than me, and it surprised me a lot. However, the blond looked at least more manageable when accompanied by the calm, smiling figure of his olive-haired friend, the pinch server if I'm not mistaken, Yamaguchi. Kuroo, however, did not seem to notice the apathetic traits of the blond, he seemed more and more dazzled every day by the latter's talent that he did not notice his defects. Who knows what he found in him ...

"You look like a stalker, Kenma"

Akaashi laughed, every time we talked about this together. Akaashi and I have been good friends right away, ever since we met. He, along with Shoyou and Yaku, our free "little one", are the only people I can tolerate. Not to mention Kuroo. Kuroo and I have always been together. Since I moved to Tokyo with my mother as a child, we haven't been there never separated. He was my neighbor, but he was also the best of best friends, at least in my opinion.

It was Kuroo who convinced me to play volleyball, it was Kuroo who helped me open up to my teammates, and Kuroo always introduced me to Akaashi, along with his noisy friend Bokuto, and it is thanks to him that now me and the owl we are friends. And then .. It was in my senior year of junior high that I realized that. Kuroo had already entered high school and I was left alone. Without him, without his presence, even without the mere awareness of not finding him a few meters away, I felt empty. I felt like someone had ripped off a part of my body with their bare hands.

It was in that moment, having the clearest knowledge of not being able to be without him, that I understood how important Kuroo really was to me. I understood that what I was feeling was not just friendship, no. It was much more and above all it had been going on for a long, long time. "You should tell him for me, Kenma. You yourself said it was too long!" Yaku had said, in his usual gentle voice and his brotherly smile. "I'm also of the same opinion as Yaku-san. Besides, it's pretty obvious that he reciprocates, come on," Shoyou echoed.

That fucking phrase he had said before the retirement. And now, every time I see Kuroo smile at Tsukishima, Shoyou's voice resounds all over my skull "Obviously he reciprocates." Then why? Why is he smiling at him like that? Why does he give him all that attention? Because he looks at it like a bell. always like that? Because? Those smiles, those attentions, that look. Kuroo addressed them only to me. He was all mine. And now? Because? Why did you have to appear, Tsukishima Kei? Why do you want to take my Kuroo away? Because?

"Hey kitty"

Opened his eyes and I realized I was still on my futon. My cheeks were streaked with tears and my eyes still shining with tears. I ... I was crying in my sleep !? I ran an arm over my eyes to wipe away the remaining tears and those that were about to fall interrupted. I looked around the room. The others were still asleep. After having walked all over the room with my eyes, my gaze finally landed on the worried face of the sender of the delicate one voice. Kuroo had his little hazel, orange-tinged, cat-like eyes pointed at mine.

He still had a hand on my shoulder. He probably must have shaken me to wake me up. "Are you okay? Why were you crying? Bad dream?" as usual, he filled me with questions. And even that protective act of him, almost like a mother, managed to melt me. Instinctively I smiled and brought my cold hand to his face. "I'm fine, I didn't even notice it, quiet"

Liar

"Sure?" You're pale and shivering under the covers. And then you were mumbling nonsense ..." Kuroo said, without taking his eyes off mine. I felt so safe with him by my side. My smile got wider and more sincere.

"I'm fine"

I'm sure" Stop lying, Kenma Kuroo, seeing my relaxed face, smiled in turn, pulled me to him and hugged me. His strong arms encircled my back. His chin was over my head. I couldn't help but smother in his perfume. Such a familiar scent, so good. He tasted like freshly made laundry, a freshly baked cake and freshly picked jasmine. He tasted like home. Kuroo equals home. Please, let it last forever "You know that anything is there, right?" he whispered after a few moments of absolute silence, broken only by the regular breaths of the rest of the silence, broken only by the regular breaths of the rest of the sleeping team.

This phrase has always sounded stupid to me. You are my best friend, of course I know you are there. I always answered him like this as a child. Yet now ... I said nothing. He nodded on his chest.

Why to me?