Once upon a time, there was a piece of poop. The poop's name was Turd. One day, Turd fell ill, and died. Turd's family was quite sad. They didn't know how they could carry on without their precious Turd. They all got together one day and decided to do a memorial for Turd.
At the memorial, Turd's sister, Turdette, got up in front and read a heartwarming goodbye letter. Then she got out Turd's will. It read:
~To my sister Turdette, I leave half my money.
~To my girlfriend Turdabell, I leave the other half of my money, our house, and my collection of poop coins.
~To my daughter Turdathina, I leave a huge tree house and a puppy. You can pick it up at the shelter.
~To my best friend Turdathan, I leave my awesome, racin' car.
