My Brother's Best Friend

119

[Nikki's POV]

       I look inside the room and see Dylan. Just laying there, completely oblivious to everything going on around him. I rush over to him and grab his hand but take a good look at his face. I can't see his amber eyes because they are closed. His moles all over make me smile just a little bit. But his lips. Oh, his lips. I remember how gentle and soft they are against mine and just start smiling like an idiot, still crying. I look behind me and Morgan is just standing there at the doorway with her hands on her mouth.
       I try not to notice the glass sticking out of his face and focus on the good things. I direct my eyes to lips again and kiss him, briefly. Nothing. No response. What was I expecting? He isn't awake right now of course he isn't going to respond. I get up and let go of his hand. We have been dating for 4 months now! He can't go I love him to much... I think. I walk back towards the door not being able to stand to look at him any longer. Not Dylan himself, but hurt. In pain. I could look at healthy Dylan all day if I could, but cut up Dylan...its so painful to look at for even half a second. We leave the room so Lisa and Julia can see him now. As we pass by them, I grab Julia's shoulder and hug her again. She gets it. Its her brother. She loves him to pieces. Lisa does too but not the way we do. She smiles faintly and distantly and walks to his room. We sit down in the waiting room and can hear Lisa in his room, screaming about her "baby boy."
        I close my eyes and before I know it I'm sleeping. I start to dream about Dylan and our first kiss in the hallway. I remember it like it was yesterday. His touch made me feel something no one else had ever made me feel before. It was magical and just amazing. My stomach erupted into storms whenever I saw him. Not with butterflies or some cutesy creature like that. No, with elephants and whales and big tigers. It wasn't just some small emotion like in the books, it was a spectacular firework show going on in my heart whenever I saw him. That's real love. Not just butterflies.
       I wake up in alarm when I hear people rushing into a room down the hallway. I hear someone shout,"Get to room one-nineteen! Its an emergency!" I stand up and start running to Dylan's room. I see nurses and doctors flooding into his room like a tidal wave. Before I go any further I hear a flatline and a scream. I stop in my tracks and sink to the floor on my knees. With my head to my chest, in the middle of the hallway, I scream as loud as I can until my throat aches and my lungs burn. I do it two more times and then I start to sob. More than any other time.
       Everything starts to move in slow motion and my head starts to pound. Someone comes over to me and says something but I can't hear them. All I can hear is Dylan teasing me and calling me babe and saying I love you to me. I'm crying and I'm at my worst in front of everyone and for once I don't care. All I care about is Dylan. Someone picks me up but I thrash and kick and scream even more...or at least I try  to. But I can't move and I can't make any noise. I'm paralyzed, and it feels worse than crying. I began to remember not only that he died. But that he lived. And that his life gave me memories to beautiful to forget. But I could never forget him, my first love.