the way you never spoke of my value.
every sentence ending in demand.
i long for a love beyond superficiality.
you've made me question my annoyances.
am i too clingy?
not beautiful enough?
does my body make up for my inadequate love?
how can i better the way you view my body.
please don't leave, i'm willing to endure as much torture as i may to be beautiful.
rip my skin off to rid of the blemishes.
ripping my hair out in hopes you would forget it was not enough.
any needle through the skin
any incision
any replacement
if i took a vow of silence to succumb to your love.
to never speak again, to never annoy you with my worries, my affection.
just to be enough.
the downward spiral
so lost, entranced by my image of you
i begin to speak to the higher powers
the goddesses of lust
i beg for them to make me beautiful
to make me the nymphette you once viewed me as.
the cunning
sexy
worthy young girl i was when we met.
i've become too large
too proud
too outspoken
i will dwindle every thought i contain to be yours, to wrap around your finger, ever longing for the love we began with.
i beg and plead
the psychosis overtakes the brain
the slamming of fists on my head, hoping that i will knock the part of me that was not adequate out.
ripping everything off the wall, screaming for love.
love will down me, stabilize me, if you leave i am nothing, my soul drags with every step you take away from me.
