Jules

about me?

As I was walking down the street fast winds started to pick up, clouds started to form above my head. What is happening? This wasn't supposed to happen today of all days.

Today was supposed to be good. The big 16 but instead my mom will probably have to cancel my birthday yet again. Every year something comes up, the worst part is it's always something new.

On my tenth birthday, my dad couldn't show up because he was in jail so I canceled. On my eleventh birthday, nobody showed up because I had no actual friends. I mean who would want to be friends with a person going through depression at such a young age. On my 12 birthday, my mom had to work and she refused to take it off. On my 13 birthday, I had just wanted the family to come so it could be like a family get-together but they all went on vacation what a shitty family. Then my fourteenth birthday I had made about 4 friends but only one came so my mom didn't go get the cake. I remember her saying something like "I'm sorry babes but that's such a waste of money". On my 15th birthday, I was the one that refuse to even think about celebrating it because why even try, every other one wasn't a success.

After all these years why should I even try? Because I'm popular now and Macy said it would be good on my popularity. She also said Gabe (my boyfriend) loves birthday parties. Really the only reason I agreed to do any of it was because she said he loves them. Sometimes he's a little scary and I don't think I want her going to tell him I refused.

Anyways back to the present time.

I'm walking home right now from Gabe's. Yes, before you ask he did offer to give me a ride home but along with him asking he gave me reasons why he really didn't want to. "My cars in the shop so we would have to drive one of the cheaper ones". "I'm supposed to meet up with the boys in 5 minutes". He even slipped up a little while saying "I don't want the boys and the girls waiting on me for too long".

So, I told him I'd just walk the short mile and id be fine. He didn't even care or try to stop me so here we are walking down the street on one of the 'best' days of my life.

Just as I reached my front door it started to downpour.

I say "Just my luck".

"What's wrong sweetie" my mom yells somewhere from the kitchen.

"It doesn't look like we will be able to throw the party" I kind of pout trying to play it off.

"Oh, why not"

"Mom it just started pouring what do you mean 'why not'"

"I personally thought we were having an inside party so it wouldn't affect the party at all" explained my mom.

"Oh, I thought you and Macy planned it outside"

Honestly, I didn't plan anything out. It's almost like it's a surprise party because nobody told me anything, the only things I know for sure was that it was supposed to be today.

"We did but we were just texting before you walked in and when Macy seeing it get bad out there" I looked at my mom weird, then she continues "anyways we decided it would be an okay idea to move it inside it's not like we had a certain reason for it to be outside anyways".

"You just said you personally thought it was going to be an inside party but now you are saying it's was an outside party you're moving inside that makes no sense" 

"We have it planned out everything will be fine"

"I'm glad you guys planned it all out already". I say kind of snotty.

The thing is if I'm getting forced to have a party shouldn't I be able to decide some things to? The answer you would get from these to ladies is no. I don't understand why and it's so annoying. Part of me feels like Macy is the daughter my mom never got and my mom loves her more than me. I know it's probably not true, it's just how I feel you know?