Enough for You

Chapter 4

My mind and body are flustered as I rise up from the bench to walk outside for a taxi. I'm like absolutely sure that I just walked out of the twilight zone and this was all just a fantasy. I'm pretty sure I'm sleeping in my bed and letting my dreams wander.

As I walk into the chilly air, I start to realize that this was not a dream at all. Never in my life have met men that are so forward, but I'm afraid to say that I loved every minute of the attention. I hail a taxi and get into it. I tell the driver the directions to my condo, and I sit back and think about what just happened.

I have had two relationships with no sex, and in one night, I've made it to second base with two different guys.

Ugh.

This behavior can't be normal. I'm a doctor for goodness sake. I'm supposed to be poised, confident, and professional. I just let two guys touch me and I know nothing about them. Is this what people do when they first meet someone or am I wayyy off base here? The driver finally pulls up to my apartment and I slowly get out of the car. I am mentally and physically drained from the day I had, and I'm ready to dive in between my sheets. I open the door to my condo and that same feeling settles around like it always does.

The feeling of loneliness and melancholy. No one to come home to; no one to call up other than Sienna and my family. Sometimes I would love to just come home to a hug, a kiss, or just someone that I can talk to through the night. It's my own fault for being so standoffish after my last breakup. When you get hurt like that, you just can't envision going through that type of pain again. But not putting myself out there has placed me here...alone.

I shake my head to clear my thoughts and I go into my bathroom to take a shower. As I start to take off my pants, I run warm all over at the fact that I came home with no underwear.

I think back to how I felt under Domenico's hands. I loved how they caressed my skin.

Damn, that was my FAVORITE pair! He owes me some new lace panties!

I wrap up my hair and place my shower cap on. I step in the shower and let the warm steam consume me. As the smell of my strawberries and cream shower gel wafts around, I try to think about what is on my agenda for work tomorrow. But, my mind keeps wandering back to the tanned hands that slide down my body into my creamy panties. My thoughts started to connect to my hands I felt my finger brushing against my waxed-

STOP Ahnia.

I shook my head to clear it from my lusty thoughts. I have to go to sleep, so I won't be so tired for work tomorrow.

I got out of the shower and dried off. I scooped my hair into a pineapple bun and got into the bed naked. I live alone. Sue me. As I set my alarm, I kept replaying the events that happened at the party. I am surprised that no one witnessed what happened with Domenico or Sire, but with my unfulfilled libido, I probably would have liked it. I would like to think I am a closet freak, but I haven't explored enough by myself to be deemed that way. I am too scared to see what would happen or what that could define me as. When I lie down and close my eyes, all I could see where two pair of eyes staring back at me.

"Dr. Kins, do I have to take this medicine. It tastes so gross!" said my 13-year-old patient Michael. "Yes Michael, you have to. Don't you want to feel better?" I asked. "Yeah, but do I have to drink this stuff? It tastes like rotten, soured grapes." "I was told by a little birdie that you have a big swimming tournament coming up." Michael's eyes lit up at the mention of his big competition that is supposed to be swimming in. "Yes, how did you know?" Michael exclaimed. "I have ears all around the hospital. If you look at the walls really closely, you may can see them," I whispered. "Anyway, Michael, you have to take the medicine so that you can feel better; if you don't, I don't know if they will let you swim." Michael looked astonished and looked down as if he couldn't make up his mind, but I knew that I was wearing him down. "Okay Dr. Kins, I'll drink the medicine, but only because I really want to compete." "Yes! Great, let's get you better kiddo." He held his nose and drank the medicine from the small container that I gave him.