Draft Messages

epilogue

To: aphroditejohnson@gmail.com
Cc/Bcc:
Subject: Good Byes are overrated

Esther told me via email that she told you the whole truth yesterday. But Aphrodite don't you see? Some things aren't meant to be... and I realized that today that we are a part of those some things that aren't meant to be.

I have been completely selfish these past few weeks because I wanted you all for myself when I was the one who broke up with you.

I mean, yeah, I wanted you to move on but is it bad because I was happy you didn't?

Although at the same time I was hell-bent on wanting you to move on.

Bi-polar? Yeah, I know. Sorry.

But right in this moment, I have made a decision. I'm letting you go. Completely. I'm setting you free because one day, you're gonna meet a guy who would make you happy.

A guy who's gonna stay long enough to marry you, not run away, treat you as if you're a fragile vase when you're pregnant, get jealous when you're talking to guys that aren't him, look for cute houses suitable for a family, spoil your children with toys and love, work his ass off to pay bills, and of course, love you forever.

There would be some fights, misunderstandings, and a few tears here and there but it would always work out in the end.

And that guy? It isn't me.

I'm just a messed up kid who ran away without telling anyone where I was going. I was that messed up kid who ran away because he wanted space. He needed time to think. That isn't the guy that is right for you. No.

Find someone who'll be strong enough to stay. I'll admit that I still love you so damn much but like I said we aren't meant to be, Aphrodite, we never would be.

Now, I'm doing the right thing and I'm setting you free. I don't want to be the reason for you to hold back your happiness.

Please do me a favor and don't look for me, heck, don't even think about me. Don't even bother emailing me here because this would be the last time I would be using this account.

I don't want you to hire a private investigator just to find me. No, just don't.

I want you to go out there, smile, and meet new people. I know you still have feelings for me and I knew I have tortured you these past few weeks but don't ever hold yourself back. Move on from me.

You are probably wondering how I knew about your feelings for me and how I knew about me torturing you, but before I tell you why I want you to know that I am not proud of this.

Alright, so, today, I opened your e-mail (who knew you still have the same password as you did before? ilovecats143) and I saw your drafts.

You have been draft messaging me. Just like I do to you. And as I read it I have felt the pain you are in. I'm truly sorry. So sorry that words couldn't describe how sorry I am.

But I want you to realize that you are better off without me. There are way better guys out there who won't be a coward to confess how they truly feel.

You're a person with a kind heart, Aphrodite. You love me even if I broke up with you. You still love me even after I tortured you by being with Mia. You even forgave me. Any guy would be so lucky to have you, I know I would be.

It hurts so much physically and emotionally to be writing each and every word in this email. But I want you to know that this isn't me saying good bye because good byes are so overrated.

Instead, this is me saying I'll see you when I know that you've fully moved on from me. I love you so much, Aphrodite, and I'm so sorry your heart belonged to someone who couldn't stay.

Love,
Noah C.

P.S: if you want to see my draft messages to you, you know the password. It hasn't changed.

Email Sent 2/03/15 8:43 pm

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APHRODITE JOHNSON

I bit my lip as tears started falling down my face. I lost count of how many times I read his email and draft messages to me.

I laughed bitterly as more tears leaked out. He must be delusional if he thinks I'm allowing him to let me go. Aunt Cara is right. True love is beautiful and hard to find now-a-days, and I wasn't gonna be an idiot and let my true love go.

Nope, he's gotta try way harder if he wants me to fall out of love for him.

I wiped tears and placed a determined smile on my face. Just you wait, I am gonna find you. And when I do, I'm gonna go all Jackie Chan on you for even deciding to let me go. Just you wait.

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