A Touch of Change

Chapter Four

They tried it again- the night out. He'd told her to be ready at six and, like always, she was. He'd told her it was nothing fancy. She wasn't one for a lot of fuss, his Lizzie. He'd learned, hadn't he, that she just wanted his time and his attention. So, he gave her both. He got her a bite to eat. He took her dancing. He took her to the cinema for a show. And she smiled. Fuck, it'd been a while since he'd seen Lizzie smile for him, for something he'd done for her.

The next day he took her for a walk about the property. She told him stories about when she was a girl. About her dream to have a place of her own- one no one could take from her. He'd told her about France- in fits and starts- about the boys and the horses. He wanted to tell her about the tunnels. He'd never wanted to tell anyone about the tunnels. Not since Grace.

It didn't feel like a betrayal- sharing something with Lizzie that he'd given to Grace. It didn't feel wrong to hold Lizzie's hand as they walked about. It felt easy. It felt right. The feeling of her being his wife- truly and for the right reasons- was easy, too. The guilt was faded, now. The ache of losing Grace, of missing Grace- it was less. And without the guilt, without the ache, he could give Lizzie the things a wife deserved. He could give her himself.

She was still a bit wary at times, even after being back a few months. Tommy would catch her watching him sometimes and he'd see it- the questions she wasn't asking. She still thought a night out was for business rather than for them, but he was working on it. He'd decided- one day she'd have no doubts. But in the meantime, he kept taking her out for walks and for dances. He kept popping in to see her during the day instead of locking himself in his office. He kept holding her hand and giving her little kisses for no reason except he wanted to. And fuck, wasn't it something to just want to.

-

The door to his office opened and Tommy glanced up in annoyance. Standing in the door was Ruby, tears in her eyes. Pushing back his chair, Tommy held out his hand. "What's this, then?" Ruby came over to his desk. Picking up his girl, Tommy set her on his lap. "Now. What's the matter, Little One?"

Ruby snuggled closer, head resting on his chest. "I was runnin' and I fell. And it made my foot go the wrong way. And now it hurts, and mum went to see Auntie Ada and I can't find nanny Sarah. And it was hurtin' really bad and Charlie told me to find you. So, I came and found you and then that's it." Tommy shifted a bit to move the papers on his desk out of the way. Then he sat Ruby on the desk. "Not s'posed to sit on the tables."

Tommy glanced up from taking Ruby's shoes off. "Yeah, well special circumstance, eh?" Ruby nodded. Tommy pulled off her little stocking so he could see her foot. It was swelling up already. "Wiggle the toes?" She did. He pressed his fingers around her ankle a bit, though he knew it hurt, but nothing felt out of place under the swelling. He figured it probably wasn't broken, just a sprain. "Alright, Miss Ruby," he said as he let go of her foot. "Seems we've got a bit of a bad foot." Ruby's eyes went wide and the tears that she'd kept from falling were suddenly spilling down her cheeks.

"No! No, Daddy! I don't a want to get shot!"

Tommy froze, trying to understand what Ruby was on about. Had someone threatened her? Was someone outside? He turned to look out the window, but there was no one about. He looked back at his girl. Her little hands were gripping onto his waistcoat tight, her eyes were turning red and getting puffy from crying. He put a hand on her head and ran his fingers through her hair like he did to calm Lizzie. "No one's getting shot. No one's gonna shoot you, Ruby, I won't let 'em."

But she just shook her head, tears leaving damp spots on her cheeks and clothes. "But when the horse got a bad foot, you told the man to shoot it. And when the dog got a bad leg you told the man to shoot it, too." Tommy took in a deep breath. He remembered the times she was talking about. He hadn't thought she was paying any attention at the time. Hadn't thought she'd understand. "Daddy, please don't tell the man to shoot me. I'm better, I promise, see?" She wiggled her toes again even though he knew it hurt her to do it.