"Well, you see doctor, it happened like this, see? Pretend my finger is me. Oh, whoops! Didn't mean to flip you off there. COMPLETELY a mistake." The doctor just rolled his eyes while I continued,
"Anyhoo, I was minding my own business, y'know, binging National Geographic documentaries, definitely not crying over baby seals being murdered. But all of a sudden, my closet was busted down, and two skeletons made of diamond stood before me! Luckily, I have great reflexes, so I threw them out the window! I thought I was in the clear, but a bipedal Alpaca opened my door. It advised against hunting them down, but I didn't listen; they would just come back! So, I ripped my shirt off, flexing my glorious 8 pack, and jumped out the window after-" The doctor raised his hand for a second, cutting me off. He lifted up my shirt to reveal my embarrassing flab. I cleared my throat.
"It was the Alpaca that took them! Anyway, I gracefully landed on the ground from the 5 story building, right on top of the skeletons. They were pinned, and said, 'Oh no! This guy is too strong, we can't take him on!' Boy, they were begging for mercy! But I didn't give it to them; I unleashed the power of nature on them, shooting lasers from my a-" "MR. Bradmoss, what does this have to do with an amputated foot request from stubbing a toe?!" He interrupted, rudely cutting me off from my tale once more.
"Listen, this'll make sense if you listen to the end." The doctor sat back down, rubbing his temples a little before gesturing for me to continue. "Alright Doc, here's Act II: The Rat Intestine Named Arthur!"
15 HOURS LATER
"...and finally, I learned a lesson about the consequences of scamming from the Sugar Plum Fairy, hitting my toe on her dog while exiting her overgrown palace. Eventually, I stumbled here; ready for your treatment!" As I finished up, I realized the doctor was groggily opening his eyes. He cracked his back, my arms still up from my 'Ta-Da' moment. The eye contact I thought he had held was nowhere to be found as he cracked his back a second time. After doing so, he checked the time, grabbed his bag and locked me in his office. My arms slowly went down, realizing my predicament.
"Hm. This'd be a good time to have that 8 pack back."
From: Anthony Bradmoss
YOU ARE READING
Record of the Chastisement
HorrorThis record is a whole composition notebook found in the ashes of a fireplace digitalized. They're completely criminal occurrences! Join various protagonists as they try their best to deal with daily life in the reformed world after _____ ______'s c...
