Sanctuaries: A Klaroline Fanfiction

35: Kiss me hard before you go

They did not sleep that night. When they had finally reached the privacy of their room in the wee hours of the morning, after everyone had returned, Caroline had just looked at Klaus with haunted eyes and whispered, "I'm still scared. Can you hold me for a while?" His gaze had darkened, and he had quickly lit the fireplace, pulled her onto the couch and gathered her so close they could both not actually breathe. Neither of them cared.

It had been a few hours by now, and they had not spoken a word. Caroline sighed into the curve of his shoulder where she had been hidden all this time. What if she was never going to experience this wonderful, serene peace again? This absolute harmony, the deep connection she shared with her man – oh, how she was afraid of losing all of that! She hadn't voiced a single doubt to Klaus, knowing that if he realized just how scared and insecure about her plan she really was, he would compel her and tie her up.

After everything she had learned about the Other Side so far, it was apparently not quite like what she had always imagined hell to be, but close enough. She would be able to move about the entire demi-world, which gave her considerably more freedom than most of the other inhabitants enjoyed, but there seemed to be no positive, pleasant, light spot to be found anywhere, and that was what she feared the most – not to have a place to put her mind to rest. She had experienced that during her first weeks in Patagonia. There had been no way whatsoever her mind could relax, being constantly focused on everything negative, dark and frightful. In this case, she assumed her own mind would have to be her sanctuary, and she sincerely hoped she would do a better job about that than she had done during her first separation from Klaus.

"What worries you the most?" his dark, low voice suddenly asked. Caroline knew he couldn't quite read her mind, but there were moments when she wondered if he was somehow able to feel what she felt. To read her emotions, in a way. Stretching in his arms, she closed her eyes.

"The Other Side seems to be a truly depressing place. What worries me is that I might not find any place to take a break from the doom and gloom. I mean, it's no big drama, I can take it, but I'm wondering if I'll be at all able to rest."

Klaus' lips were on her hair. God, I'm going to miss that like crazy! "Have you ever heard of the so-called Memory Palace?" he inquired.

Caroline shook her head, eyes still closed. "No. What is that?"

"It basically is a mnemonic technique dating back to Ancient Greek and Roman times, usually employed to confine great amounts of information to memory. But it can also be used as a method of escaping reality for a while when required. It takes years to build, but you can start with a few simple memories. Whatever shape or form works best for you and that you find most appealing, you use as the ground layout. It can be a building with many different rooms, a detailed landscape, a fantasy place… whatever you like to look at. Then you assign a specific memory to a certain room or a portion of your landscape. For instance, let us assume you take our mansion in Mystic Falls as the layout. Recall any given memory, like our wedding day, in as much detail as possible and store it in the study. Now every time you enter our house in your mind, you know that when you visit the study, you will find that specific memory. The actual technique is a little more complex than that, but due to lack of time to properly introduce you to the principle, it will need to suffice for now. With time, you can assign everything to a place of your Memory Palace, not just full reminiscences but things like sounds, songs, sights, smells. At some point, you will be able to take a figurative walk through your Memory Palace, choosing the rooms or places to visit – and those to avoid." He paused to press another tender kiss to the top of her head. "So why don't you think about a place you begin to build your palace around and then choose your two or three happiest memories and store them there? It will enable you to take a short walk and visit them each time you feel like the Other Side gets to you in too intense a way. Furthermore, you can immediately begin to store the memories and experiences you gain down there to their own rooms. For anything that really bothers, hurts or frightens you, you might want to choose a place way removed from the entrance to your palace and far away from your happy places. Make it a longer walk to reach them, maybe store them in a lock room or a cellar, whatever works best for you. Escape to your palace whenever you need to. Building it is an ongoing process, it never truly ends. And it will also help you to preserve the staggering amount of experiences you will have over the course of the centuries."