Where Is The Edge

Chapter 7

(TW: Mention of self-harm)

After dinner was ready, Travis woke his younger brother and brought him into the dining room to join us. When little Kyle saw me, he reacted just like his big brother; he ran to me and held out his arms, so I knelt down to hug him.

"Did you bring ice cream?" Was the first thing he said, which made me laugh audibly.

"Sorry to disappoint you, but no. Besides, it's too late for ice cream," I responded, standing up, "your mom, your brother and I made dinner, do you want to try it? You be the critic."

He rubbed his eyes and walked into the dining room, I sat next to Marcia's empty chair after setting the table, and Travis sat next to Kyle. The brown-haired woman walked over to me with my plate full of food as I smiled and thanked her. She then placed their respective plates on each of her children's plates and returned to sit with hers.

The children did not stop talking. Multiple times Marcia warned them to chew before they talked, otherwise they would choke. I laughed at Travis's witticisms and his anecdotes about school, Kyle interfered to talk about his favorite show and how he already knows how to put his shoes on without help. It was after we all finished eating that their mother demanded that they go get changed, brush their teeth and go to bed, both of them immediately objected, as we were in the middle of a very pleasant conversation, so I proposed that I would visit them more often soon. Even Marcia was fascinated by the idea.

Finally, I was left alone with her. I wasn't sure if she would take me home because it was her bedtime, or if I would have the joy of spending some more time with her. Luckily, the second option turned out to be the better choice.

"Would you like to enjoy some wine?" The older woman inquired, already bringing out two glasses. When I nodded, she proceeded to pour said beverage into both glasses and then glanced at the couch, motioning me to head over there. "I want to thank you for being such a sweetheart to my kids. I know they miss me when I'm not around and you know that the babysitter they have isn't the best, so they get bored a lot. That you're willing to visit them means a lot to me," she said sincerely.

As we both sat on the couch, I took the glass of wine she handed me and took a sip, "there's nothing to be thankful for. I'm sure it will do them and me good to get out of the routine."

"Speaking of routine, how have you been feeling? I must confess that I sympathize with my clients, but I focus so much on beating the other side, on doing my job, that sometimes I forget that you must be devastated," her eyes fixed on mine, her gaze possessed a great empathy for me and in her voice was palpable the genuine interest in knowing the feelings that have taken hold of me.

How did I feel? I felt that I had failed, the simple fact of being a suspect in that murder indicated it. I didn't regret it at all, but I wasn't ready to face the consequences. That was the least of it. I thought it would be a piece of cake to lie to my lawyer, little did I know that she was going to steal my heart from the very first moment, and the fact that she trusts me, giving me the opportunity to know her family environment, makes my conscience twist.

Unfortunately, my whole life has been about putting others above myself. Confessing to murder, just because Marcia doesn't deserve to be lied to, would only make it easier for me to be sent to jail, no matter how much she defends me. She would understand my reasons, and anyone with a little humanity would understand, yet the people we would most need to understand wouldn't even bother to try. So I had to clear my head and be true to the plan and the lies so that I could get away with it. For once, I had to put myself first.