Imperfect

Part 4

Cataleya

Today I am moving in with Rich Man. The moving van is packed and ready. I get Made one last time by myself. I get in the van and drive to his house. When I arrive, everyone else appears. The people across the street open up their curtains and a girl and boy take pictures together. The husband kisses the wife and they look so in love. So perfect. Her jewelry is blinding in the shining light. I am not that pretty but I can try to be as perfect. Rich Man won't care, he loves me like the husband loves the wife. The Little Girl looks through the window at me smiling, I wave.

Rich Man then notices I am here, "Cataleya! How are you Love?"

"Hello! I am really good."

"That's spectacular," he says clasping his hands together.

We take out all of my belongings and he gets me settled in his extra bedroom. The house is more spacious than anything I have ever had. I feel like a princess and he is my prince.

Later that night I go to the bathroom. I strip off my tight dress and step into the hot shower. When I come out of it, the steam has fogged up the mirror and I can't see a thing. I take the towel and wipe away the water that has formed. What looks back is a streaked version of myself. Wet hair, dripping down my back. Face smeared with makeup, the black running down my pale face. Bones sticking out with a sad looking canvas over, covered in bruises and cuts. How can I be beautiful? How can anyone love me? I am too skinny, my hair is too much, and I don't look the same without makeup. What did Rich Man see in me? Why am I here in this gigantic house when I feel so small. The distance is frightening. There is so much here and all the opportunities of a better life are laid out for me, but I am still the same girl who wakes up and gets Made. I will always be that girl and all the makeup won't change what is underneath, the more poofy the dresses won't hide my bones, and all the love won't change what I see in the mirror.