Nobody wants to be the only one that's left standing
Nobody wants to be the only one to understand
~*~*~
"And I got what I have wanted from the moment I set eyes on it."
Lizzie heard the words. She heard them and yet she didn't want to believe them. Because he'd said, hadn't he? He'd said the words. 'I love you', he'd told her. Yet this was Tommy. And what Lizzie wanted rarely meant anything where he was concerned. So, she did believe it. And when she looked to her husband and his eyes would not meet hers, she knew. Everyone at that fucking table knew.
"Elizabeth, you are a very lucky woman..." She forced her eyes from Tommy. She forced herself to look at Diana. "...to have each day what I have only sampled the once." Her voice, it grated. Her words, they cut- deeper than Lizzie'd expected. She hadn't expected fidelity- theirs was not that type of marriage. But she had thought... Well, it didn't matter what she thought, did it? Because here they were, sat at her dining room table while Tommy's latest fuck smiled at her.
And it shouldn't have hurt so much, but it did. It hurt. So much that her lungs felt tight and her eyes stung. And she'd be damned if she cried in front of these people. She'd be damned if she cried in front of Tommy. So she stood, too quickly, without another glance at the people sitting at the table. She walked out- gracelessly, she knew. She left them all sitting there. Wishing the humiliation and the pain could have been her secret. Wishing to have been the only one to understand what had just been revealed.
And she knew not to expect him to come after her.
But somehow being the only one standing- the only one to care- hurt a thousand times worse.
---
And now I'm seeing the way that you're leaving
Without me
~*~*~
They hadn't spoken since that night.
He'd heard her talking to Charlie and the servants. He'd seen her moving from one room to the next, head high and eyes fixed on anything but him. He'd watched the way she seemed to have grown cold and hard in the span of one night. In the space of one dinner. There was no softness to her anymore- least not for him.
It was a strange thing, losing what he'd never wanted. It was a strange thing missing the one he'd told himself he'd be fine without. But that was a different time, wasn't it? Things had changed. He'd seen the truth, seen what he'd not let himself before. And yet there was still that bit of himself he didn't look at- that thing he couldn't hide from.
He'd changed the combination to the safe, but she was still his greatest regret.
Footsteps coming down the stairs pulled his attention. Tommy listened to his wife's voice, listened to the familiar cadence of her words- too low for him to make out. But he didn't need to hear the words. Her tone had him sitting taller. Had him getting to his feet and moving towards the door. The sound of footsteps on the stairs came again. The nanny brought a suitcase- Charlie's. Tommy looked to his wife, his eyes settled on the luggage at her feet.
"Lizzie."
The nanny stopped at the foot of the stairs. The chauffer shifted nervously on his feet. But Lizzie... She didn't even so much as twitch. "Go on, then, Will. Take the luggage to the car. I'll be ready to leave in a moment." The man hesitated, eyes going to Tommy before moving to follow his mistress's command. Nanny Sarah followed a moment later with Charlie's suitcase, not lifting her eyes from the floor.
