7 Days Untill Suicide

Day 1: Depression

Some Date...Some Time...

I was at school one day just a normal happy day..WRONG! It was a horrible day...I was depressed, and as everyone walked pasted me just looking at me as I was tearing up with red eyes...it seemed like the whole world stopped, and focused on me for a second. My friend ran up to me as I went outside and sat on the grass with my hands on my face, "Whats wrong?" "What's wrong?" Was all I could hear...something in me said to not answer...my friends seemed worried so they saud would I like to talk to the teacher about it, I shock my head...they sat but me, along with a very nice girl...

The girl was very worried about me, my friend saw a tear in my eyes, I was about to cry...then my other friend came by me..he looked at me and didn't notice I was tearing up until the next few seconds...I sobbed a little, the sky seemed to turn darker and darker as the darkness inside me surrounded me. In my mind I was crying and thinking about my friends...I wanted to shout, just leave me alone!, but I didn't want to hurt their feelings, my friend had a idea, but he asked me was I mad at him, was it something he said...I shock my head no.  My bestie tried to help me...but nothing helped the sadness and darkness inside.

I hugged my friend, and silently cried on her. She hugged back a told me could I say anything. I just sat there and didn't answer, it got awkward after a while so I whispered...then my friends said: "huh?" 

I said quietly..I was planning something big...all my friends we're wondering "What?" Then I told them...."im going to suicide myself..." they looked at me in shock and we're looking at me like I was serious which I was...they asked me "WHY!?"  I said "because my life is hell..." before I could finish my sentence...I started to cry.

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Soon after school...I took off my backpack..and acted happy when I saw my parents and you know parents...every time after school..."how was your day?" I said good...as usual even though it wasn't

I did my homework, then I watched some Spongebob Squarepants on tv...I got bored and that dark..suicide feeling hit me again..my eyes started to tear up so then, I ran to my room and slammed my face to my pillow and shut my door while my little 6 year old sister was in the living room looking at me as she saw me run to my room.

I silently cried on my bed and wrote in a little journal...it said:

Why do I even bother...once I wrote that a tear dropped on the journal paper I closed the journal so it didn't rip...I just lied down there...thinking, a feeling to cry, violence, and emotional-personal feelings for someone...I thought about all that stuff..then I put it all together and as soon as I knew it, I feel asleep...

And a whole new day began...

(To Be Continued...)