Ping* his username pops up I squeal a little on the inside I open the message and laugh god he's so nerdy pfff I text back he likes my message my heart lights up he does nothing bare minimum and I feel my chest tighten and a smile so big you'd think I'd just won the lottery he sends me a song and listen and smile the whole time he made me a playlist I almost flopped over and died he likes the same game as me but these are friend things he wants to share music and play games I wanna hug kiss cuddle and hold hands he messages back I get flustered becuz I was just thinking abt kissing him god I'm an idiot I say we converse I can't stop smiling he makes me so happy I really don't want to like him I feel like if he would look at me I would melt my heart yearns for him :( I hate it sm he makes me feel so special over things he does way more with other ppl I can't fall any harder from him cuz then I'd fall thru hell N8dnnjindijnfijnf I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE he sends a photo of his face he's adequate nothing special just tall that's litteraly irte which makes it worse... becuz ik it's reality when I'm only attracted to the personality :/
Update... god I messed up bad i miss him he's stopped talking to me as much lately I feel like he's ignoring me but his story says otherwise but prolly for another girl anyways I want him so bad I hate myself :/ I need help asap
UPDATE
guess what i hate his bitch ass and he can go suck a dick :D
UPDATE! we haven't talked in a full conversation in 3 weeks... I messaged him yesterday dry small texts (from his side) and hours in between each... I'm not so much in love with him anymore my feelings used to be fatal he has a gf now... she's really pretty... I'm jealous of both of them I envy them so much... I talk to no one now. I hate everyone. More so now then before. He made my life better it made me happy to breathe knowing that he probably texted now he's at the bottom of all my convos. I miss him a lot. More than you could imagine. Im serious, I hate that I am. I hope he's really happy. I really do. I don't even call him bestie anymore. So instead I type his name with a typo ***t****o*
He sucks i hate him but I will miss him dearly.
Update. Kind of same as the last one but his girlfriend broke up with him I tried forcing myself back in and being a supportive friend I'm back to bestie but nothing feels right when I'm talking with him anymore I don't even think I have a crush on him anymore I just like talking to him but it also makes me sad for some reason i miss when we were closer well... as close as two people who have never conversed in irl can be.
UPDATE
guess what i hate his bitch ass and he can go suck a dick :D
