Brazen

4

At the end of the week my library shift was yet again on a Friday. I'd known that getting a job would somewhat disturb the number of outings I'd participate in, but I didn't expect it to destroy it. It's amazing how many parties there are on Fridays compared to Saturdays, when I'm free to do as I please.

In a split instant I make the decision to go out after my shift, if it were to a bar, a house party or just to see my friends, I would do it. The thought had been fluttering through my mind as the day grew darker and my patience ran thinner.

Maybe it's because I'm not used to school life yet. Or maybe it is because I'm on my period, but my dark mood looms over me. Jessica had asked me to pass her the books in need of being put on the shelves and I had snapped at her to get them herself. In my defence they were closer to her than they were to me.

It's been busier today than last Friday though, the few computers occupied, and groups of teens huddled around desks and books. But as the day grows older the library clears and people vacate, I'm not unsurprised to see the library empty, the always utilised seat abandoned where the old man sat only a week ago. I guess that he got bored of 'Carrie' - or maybe he took it home? If he did, he certainly didn't scan it before he left.

Since I took Jessica's last fifteen minutes at the desk last week, I've made her take my last quarter of an hour. She seemed willing but I'm putting that down to her rational fear of me.

In my opinion the last half hour before the library shuts is the worst because many students come for last minute textbooks, the queues at least a few people deep. I once witnessed a fight over a book about the history of Cuba.

I hum along to the radio, which is sat nearby next to Jessica who is smiling goodbye to the last remaining person in the line. It's playing hits from the 80s, 90s and 2000s and even though it doesn't seem like Jessica is enjoying it, I am.

Would library boy show up again?

A wheeled cart full of books sits beside me as I alphabetically stack books on the shelves, shifting my hips gently to the voice of . The door opens and I curiously look to see who it is. Surprise plagues me: It's the guy from last week.

He's wearing a look of confidence as he saunters in, the big book hanging in his hand as it once had. Once he sees Jessica at the desk he pauses in his walk and looks around before he catches eyes with me. I can see his tongue pressing against his cheek as half of his mouth raises slightly in a smirk. This only arouses the raise of an eyebrow from me which he seems to enjoy because his smile becomes wider.

I prepare for him to come over, and I prepare to look completely unbothered with his presence and the state of his overwhelmingly attractive appearance. But surprisingly he doesn't; instead going over to Jessica. Well sucks to be you buddy, she has a boyfriend.

On the good side, a banging song comes on the radio and I almost lose thought of his presence only a few metres away - this is until I can hear Jessica let out a giggle, sweet, mellifluous and feminine as one would want it to be.

Jessica's that girl in school who you would automatically be jealous of. No matter how nice she was to you. No matter how effortlessly likeable she was. That only made you hate them more. You would ponder the ideology that someone out there in the terrible world, does things in their spare time like volunteer. It's not that I didn't want to be that girl, because trust me I did, but it's hard to try and focus on the rest of the world when your narcissistic teenage mind only cared about the number of spots on your face and whether your crush likes you back. So yeah, you could say I'm being slightly prejudice against Jessica - but it's hard when you're trying to become all self-loving and there's a constant reminder that someone out there is so naturally nice and pretty to always outshine you. But that's life kids. There's always going to be that person.