Inside Job (FNAF: SB Rewrite)

Chapter 40 - I'd Never Ruin Your Memory

Michael had told me I didn't have to speak at the funeral if I didn't want to, but I did deeply consider it. The truth was, I didn't know what I was going to say. I couldn't go up there and talk about the awful memories I had with her, and I knew if I tried to lie I'd break down. I'd probably break down regardless of what I said.

That didn't mean I didn't want to talk. I had a lot of thoughts, but they all felt too mean to share publicly.

The days leading up to the funeral were fuzzy. It was like I'd just space out for hours and forget what happened. I'd be transported from place to place, hearing new things or talking about something. My memories became disjointed. I couldn't remember things in order. Michael noticed, but he pretended that it didn't worry him. I started apologizing to myself when everything became confusing. I didn't have to, it just made me feel slightly better.

My prosthetic wasn't ready yet. Michael started assembling one for me. I think he felt guilty about it and thought if he built it himself he would feel less shame. He had thought about getting me a wheelchair, but he thought it'd be difficult to take it in and out of the car when he felt I didn't necessarily need it. So, to move around, I was given crutches. They had a circular band around the top that I could put my arms through, so when I let go of the bar that my hands held on to, I didn't have to worry about it falling. They were black, too, and a lot more futuristic and stylish compared to the crutches when someone broke a leg. They fit perfectly with my outfit for the funeral.

Michael bought me new clothes for it. All my formal clothes didn't fit me anymore. He got me a black blazer, white shirt, and black pants. I wore thin gloves too, but not necessarily for the funeral. I just found my burn scars on my hands embarrassing. Michael got me a tie, too, and he helped put it on. His outfit was pretty similar to mine, but I supposed that made sense. There's not much variety when it comes to funeral clothes.

The ride there was quiet. I knew the animatronics couldn't come, but I wanted to bring Bowtie along. Michael said I shouldn't, it'd be too much of a distraction, not relying on it to be silent during the ceremony. I knew he was right, but I still just wanted to bring something to hold on to so that I wasn't just fidgeting in place. So, he told me to hold onto the Fredbear toy we found in Evan's room.

I didn't like it at first. It felt like it was watching too intently, and it just reminded me of the horrible nightmare I had where I lived through Evan's eyes. Then, Michael explained to me that Evan's spirit was watching over me. I knew it was just some childish tale to make me feel better, but... I did like holding it. Bowtie was still better, of course, but Fredbear was a good substitute. I liked thinking I was showing Evan the modern world through the eyes of the doll. Michael would hold onto it for me while I was moving around in the crutches, but when I was sitting and my hands were free, he'd give it to me.

I met a lot of my mother's friends. Some of them I already knew, but some I had no idea about. Michael even recognized a few of them, but most of them seemed displeased. I couldn't blame them. They knew Michael had abandoned us and were probably both surprised and disappointed to see him here. He basically had to beg to be allowed in. He wanted to be part of the planners as well, but he was already pushing his luck with just trying to be invited.

One of them yelled at Michael outside of the church. She called him some... not so nice words, but he seemed unfazed by it. He let her scream out her frustrations until she calmed down.

Another one of her friends asked me if I was alright, and I told her I was fine. She kept talking, and soon enough I realized she was specifically worried about how Michael was treating me. I told her that he was nice. She asked if I ever felt unsafe around him. I said no. She told me her door was always open if I needed a place to stay. I said thanks.