DISARMED - Inanimate Insanity AU (ComedyGold/Tissyang)

X - Red and Round Encounter

TW/CW: Disrespectful gestures, Queerphobia, Bullying

Next Morning, Trophy's POV

"Trophy, rise and shine!" Soap said in a singsong voice.

"Shut up." I growled.

"Trophy!" She yelled.

"What."

"It's 7 in the morning, Trophy! I have to clean!"

"Wh- oh, god, I overslept!"

I ran downstairs, smelling bacon. I almost fell down the stairs, knowing Yin-Yang will definitely eat it all once he gets downstairs. I sit at the table and wait for Paper to finish cooking it.

"Paper!" A familiar voice yelled.

"Huh?"

"C'mere!"

Paper walked out of the kitchen. Yin-Yang came down and tucked their egg into its nest. YinYang Jr. came up to them and rubbed against their legs.

"Hey, kitty."They said, picking the kitten up. It mewed softly. "Where's the food?"

"Still cooking." I said, realizing the bacon was still going, and probably being burned. I rushed over and took the bacon off. It was brittle, and kinda melted in your mouth. Just the way I like it. Yin-Yang just took like 6 or 7 pieces and walked over to the couch to watch over his egg.

"I wonder what's inside of you. Maybe... a temporary tattoo or paper lotus." Yin contemplated out loud.

"Let's crack it open!" Yang shouted.

"No!"

"Calm down, lil' bro, I'm kidding. I'm not gonna hurt our future child."

I saw Cheesy enter the room, with a blanket wrapped around him.

"So cold..." He complained.

"You ok?" I asked.

"Yeah, I accidentally left my window open last night."

Paper walked back out, his top left corner was a bit wet.

"Paper?" I said to get his attention.

"OJ tripped and fell." He said.

"Oh." I replied.

✰✰✰

The room got more and more crowded. I heard commotion about Paintbrush eating a raw egg, which made me giggle. Knife and Pickle were there, apparently those two and Salt and Pepper split up. Balloon's... somewhere. Salt & Pepper looked at me while whispering though. I shot them a bird (flipped them off). They both shot me birds right back. Yin-Yang was talking with Tissues about the egg (not the one paintbrush ate). Yang's calmed down a lot since he and Yin started dating Tissues. He's really good for them. Although there's the occasional uproar from Yang, he's mostly quiet. Salt & Pepper giggled at the two.

"They're weird." Pepper said.

"I know, right? Tissues is dating 2 people, like a cheater!" Salt said. "Plus, of all people, Yin-Yang dates Tissues! He's gross! And a cripple."

"Oh, shut it." I snapped.

Salt scoffed at me. "Be quiet, fatso."

"Make me!" I yell.

(Trophy's being in character again, wowie

also S & P oh no)

Salt stuck her tongue out at me. I laughed. Who does she think she is?! I'm Trophy!