your fault

chapter 15

~~Deku's POV~~   --!i SELF HARM i!-- (quick authors note: when the words|are|like|this the person is thinking really fast and when "its|like|this" they are talking fast out loud)

I get to Kachan's room and close the door, not minding to lock it. I walk to the bathroom, locking that door. I pull up my sleeve and put the daggers to my skin.

slice...

slice...

slice...

blood drips into the sink and I have a sudden feeling of relief but not enough...I press down harder.

slice...

I give off a sigh and just feel the blood flowing down my skin, hearing the drips hit the bowl of the sink.

I didn't realize how hard I put the daggers down and I end up passing out and falling to the floor, not hitting my head on anything but the floor.

~~Time skip~~

I hear a faded yell while fluttering my eyes open to see a blurry figure with what looks to be blond hair.

"DEKU!" and with that yell, everything came back, my vision was back and I can hear.

"huh...?" I respond to him "k-kachan?" I speak out in a low voice.

"what the fuck, Deku? what the hell is this?!" Kachan asks holding my head in his lap.

"I uhhh... what do you mean....?" I ask, not remembering what I did to myself.

"this" Kachan says lifting my cut arm so I could see it.

my eyes widen and I sit up fast as possible pulling my sleeve down, making the four cuts sting like hell.

"ah!" I respond to the pain. Kachan pulls me to him and hugs me.

"dont do that to yourself..." Kachan whispers in my ear, causing a tiny blush to come across my face.

 "why..." I ask.

"you have me to help you dumbass, I don't want you doing this, it hurts everyone around you, not just yourself, don't be so goddamn selfish. I know you've gone through hell, and you have some right to do that, but please don't" Kachan goes on with this whole speech.

".....ill try, I'm sorry i can't promise anything" I answer.

"thank you..." Kachan says and before I knew it I felt lips crash into mine.

what the hell...

we stay like that, lips to lips for a good 30 seconds before Kachan pulls away, but I wasn't ready to, so I pull him closer and crash my lips back onto his. I can feel Kachan flinch when I pulled him in. After a bit, I decided to let go of him and face the other way.

"you calmed down now...?" Kachan asks

"I'm never calm okay I barely sleep like- every 3 days yes while you think I'm 'sleeping' I'm not, i just close my eyes and pretend. iv done self-harm since i was- i dont know- fourteen?!" I say, I keep on listing things before suddenly Kachan pulls me into another hug.

this time I just end up crying for about 20 minutes filled with apologies and more sobs all the while Kachan sits there patting my head and running his fingers through my hair, calming me down a lot.

"i-im s-sorry kachan" 

"stop saying that nerd," Kachan says in a sweet tone

"....okay," I say. Now fully calmed down

"you good now...?" Kachan asks and I just nod my head "okay" and with that, he picks me up and carries me to his bed

"h-hey!" I yell at him

"Just shut it, nerd," Kachan says sitting me down on the bed straight up though I don't know how because I'm not straight, so this is one feat for him "stay here," he says while walking back into the bathroom and coming back with Neosporin and bandages

"what are those for?" I ask and kachan just points to my wrist "oh...right..." I say

Kachan then kneels on the floor and grabs my hand with the cuts above it and starts putting Neosporin on my cuts. I flinch at a small sting, though I don't know why. Then he starts putting the bandages around them

"thank you....Katsuki"

(643 words)

AUTHORS NOTE: 

I'm sorry for making you guys wait so long for this chapter, to be honest, this kept me from doing it to myself so I guess I'm kinda glad that I wrote this?? I don't know, but anyway. I thought I'd have a special bonding moment or something in this chapter so yeah, hope you liked it <3

love, Biblista_5775, or if you knew me before, thats_a_lil_fruity