I've forgiven myself for the pain you caused.
I feel my skin all too often now, it's weight overbearing.
I can still feel you.
I want to peel it off, break the layers of myself like an onion, strip myself of nothing so I can breathe for a moment.
Feel.
The water boils in the shower, steam fills my lungs as I attempt to wash the bruises you've painted off my skin.
I can still smell you.
I've allowed this feeling to consume me, drown me; become me. It's grown intertwined with my heart strings, ripping them apart; consuming me like I am water evaporating under the heat of the sun.
Who am I?
Who the fuck am I anymore?
The drugs take over my thoughts
I've forgotten the color of your eyes
The silence fills the crevices you used to touch
I've forgotten the sound of your voice
The music drowns you,
but I drown by your side.
I'll always forgive you for the pain you've caused
over and over again
until I drown alone
in silence.
