The Cat in the Tree books 1-3

The cat in the tree

           There was a cat in the tree and it was 100 million years old, and the cat was named Vos Gillition Howard III. He was the king of all kings. But there was a god that he looked up to, and her name was Zraa. Zraa was the god of the chicken tenders. Cats love chicken tenders and anything chicken.  Vos Gillition Howard III has a friend. He was a cermit named Cermit. He had a cermit sister named Paseh (a tan cermit). A cermit is a kind of dog and we don't know if there going to groooww.
         Remember" cermit said. Cermits are fully grooown. We cermits are one of a kind. We love chicken everyday.  Let's get back to Vos gillition howard III the cat on the tree. Today is his birthday and he was turning 100,000,001 years old. He had a birthday with his friends, and since he was so old he got to have 2 wishes and they were to get as much chicken tenders as he wanted and the other wish he had was to meet Zraa the god of the chicken tenders in real life.
          He used a good good good good good chicken tender cake. The ones that will give you any wish you wanted no matter what. But you need a super mega unicorn rainbow poop. To make it and every 1 out of 106828682 unicorn rainbow is a super mega unicorn rainbow poop.
          They were mad when one was a dud super mega unicorn rainbow poop. That means that they had to find another one. But it was worth it. "Well, I did not tell you this but you can't wish for everything you want. You can't wish for 2 things. One thing is that you can't wish for a super mega unicorn rainbow poop. And you also can't wish for a gold poop. You need that for gold chicken tenders. After Vos Gillition Howard III made his wish about all the chicken tenders he could have and to meet Zraa the god of all chicken tenders the chicken tenders appeared in his favorite room.  But Zraa the god of all chicken tenders did not show up. He was sad that she did not show up and he started to not look up to her. But then she came and he was so happy that he did a backflip.
           Then she said that he was trash and that she did not want to come. She he had made her go because she turned into a baby 17 years ago and now she is in her teens and she was mean so he made her leave and she was so happy she did a weird dance move called the dab cermit said whatt is thatt called. Vos said i don't know.