Psychic Medium Sausalito CA

Healer Sausalito CA

SHE WHO DOES NOT BELIEVE IN HERSELF

"Here is a sneak peek from my upcoming book Spiritually Medicated. Visit my website KylaLam.com for updates or to book your healing session.

I've struggled with feelings of not being good enough my whole life, and guess where it stems from? Yes, childhood and subsequent experiences following. When I read for other people, I always hear some form of "this person doesn't believe in themselves". Very common, especially if you're an empath, it's just part of the territory; we make everything about us, something we are not doing enough of for other people, a perceived shortcoming that only we are aware of and no one else. These feelings are unconscious and have been with us our whole lives, so it's difficult to detect anything is off, so it becomes a part of who we are; after all, we can't fix something if we don't know it's there.

Not believing in yourself manifests in tricky ways. It's the reason you don't leave your job and pursue your dream, it's the reason you're afraid to ask for a raise, it's the reason you don't ask that person out on a date, it's the reason you don't get started on that book you've always wanted to write. Except we don't say it's because I don't believe in myself, we say, I'm afraid or I don't know how or I'm not ready. Why? Because we are afraid of being rejected (we aren't good enough to get a sure yes), we are afraid of what people think (insecurity and judgment), we're afraid no one would read what we have to say (who am I to write a book), all variety of not believing in ourselves. These beliefs all come from somewhere, all behaviors and beliefs are learned and programmed from the start through our environment and interpretations of our experiences. We personalize and assign meanings to everything and we make it mean something about us, especially as children. So if you had to guess, where would your fear of rejection come from? Probably another time when you were rejected, probably another time when someone made you feel unimportant. Why don't you believe you can't have your dream career? Perhaps you were told it was smarter to have a steady paycheck than to strike out on your own and you were programmed to believe it's safer to not rock the boat if things are ok as they are - and a mediocre life is fine. We are taught to be fearful and therefore complacent right where we are.

So, how do we start believing in ourselves? It starts with engaging with that inner child daily and building a relationship with the little you who is scared and needs love and encouragement. It's revisiting as many moments on your timeline in your time machine to tell your little self these experiences mean nothing and you are love beyond measure and capable and worthy of achieving your biggest dreams. It's challenging every incident of the past that made you question your abilities and belief in yourself. We are talking years and years of life experiences here, most you have likely forgotten all about or didn't the incident think had an impact on you. It's a constant if not daily commitment at first to break out of the subconscious programming, but don't let the big picture of where you'd like to be intimidate you into not getting started today. It's the lack of consistency and commitment that plays into the illusion of not moving forward; it would be like wanting to lose 20 pounds, but not committing to at least one healthy meal a day and only exercising once in a while and expecting measurable results.