Caramel Frappe-Chino II Lander

❥𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟏

2 weeks after the accident.

I roll over in my bed to check the time. My alarm clock reads 7:45, when I would normally get up and get ready for school. I'm not going to school.

I roll over to face the window, the blinds closed with sunlight slipping through the cracks.

I was up all night, unable to sleep. It's not abnormal, at least, not after what happened. After what happened...

I push the thoughts away, instead bringing happier ones to mind. Practicing with the club, going on walks with Hailey, helping Sean out with new tracks, and.. practicing the drums. With Saylor.

Everything brings her back to mind, like some metal chain-ball that never breaks. Saylor being the ball, the chain nailed to me. Burdened.

I blame myself for that night. For what happened. If I would've just listened to her, and slowed down, she would still be here. Waking me up, eating breakfast with me, practicing for the big competition. We would always practice our instruments. Her on the piano, me on the drums.

Of course, I don't know why I keep thinking, hoping, I'll hear her piano playing coming from the living room. Wishful thoughts always bind themselves to broken hearts.

"Luke, dear? Are you up?" I hear a soft knock on the door, following my mothers voice.

"Mhm. What's up mom?" I mutter, sitting up in bed.

"May I come in?" She asks quietly.

"Yeah, c'mon in."

The knob groans slightly as it turns, the door swinging open. My mother appears, wearing her pink house coat and white slippers Saylor had gotten her a few Christmas' before.

"Are you going to school today?" She asks, sitting on my bed. I see bags beneath her golden eyes, and I can tell she can't sleep much either. I sigh.

It would really make her happy..

I don't want to go, I want to curl up under the covers and stare at the wall. Think. Tell myself over and over again it's. my. fault.

I stare at the wall ahead of me, debating. I must've been staring for awhile, because my mom begins talking again.

"You don't have to, Luke. Not if your not ready." She says, placing her hand atop mine. I nod, looking down.

"I.. I'll go.." I say. I look over to my mom and see her smiling. It makes me smile a little.

"That's great, honey. I'll go wake up Say-" She starts, cutting herself off. "I'll go get ready to drive you." She says, hugging me before standing, walking out of my room. I sigh, regretting my choice.

I guess I should get ready, then..

I throw off the blankets and swing my legs over the edge of the bed. I stand, walking over to my closet and grabbing some clothes before changing. Black jeans, white t-shirt, and a red hoodie.

After I change I walk down the steps, taking my phone out of my pocket. I see tons of texts and missed calls. I've rarely checked my phone, keeping it on silent a lot of the time.

I see the music club group chat, filled with messages of Sean, Milly, Jake, and Hailey trying to reach me. I send a single text, saying:

Luke: Sorry for not replying, guys. I'm ok. I'll see you all at school today.

As soon as I put my phone in my pocket, I feel a few vibrations.

Sean: Awesome! Can't wait to talk to you in person again. :)