swiftpaw, standing with their back turned: i've been expecting you, ghostpaw.
ghostpaw: how did you do that without turning around?
swiftpaw: ...to be perfectly honest, the first couple of people i did that to were not you.
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swiftpaw: stop buying plastic skeletons for halloween! it's terrible for the environment!
fluffpaw: yeah! locally sourced, all natural skeletons are much more environmentally friendly!
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swiftpaw: fluffpaw and i have the kind of easy chemistry where we finish each other's-
fluffpaw: sentences.
swiftpaw: don't interrupt me.
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swiftpaw: what doesn't kill me should run, because now i'm fucking pissed.
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swiftpaw: in my defense, i was left unsupervised.
fluffpaw: wasn't ghostpaw with you?
ghostpaw: in my defense, i was also left unsupervised.
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fluffpaw, texting swiftpaw: swiftpaw! help I’m being kidnapped
swiftpaw: where are you?
fluffpaw: i’m with some strange person. in a car. help.
swiftpaw: i’ll call ghostpaw.
ghostpaw, answering his phone: hello?
swiftpaw: where’s fluffpaw? she texted me saying that she was being kidnapped.
ghostpaw: fluffpaw? what do you mean, she's right next to me-
ghostpaw:
ghostpaw: i’ll call you back. *hangs up*
ghostpaw: THE NEW HAIRCUT ISN’T THAT BAD!
fluffpaw: WHO ARE YOU?!
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fluffpaw: would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 million gold?
swiftpaw: you stab me, and then when my leg gets better, we buy a big-ass house.
ghostpaw: you can stab me too, then we'll have 20 million.
swiftpaw: good thinking.
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swiftpaw: dandelions symbolize everything i want to be in life.
ghostpaw: fluffy and dead with a gust of wind?
swiftpaw: unapologetic. hard to kill. feral, filled with sunlight, bright, beautiful in a way that the conventional and controlling hate but cannot ever fully destroy. stubborn. happy. bastardous. friends with bees. highly disapproving of lawns. full of wishes that will be carried far after i die.
fluffpaw: *muffled* edible.
swiftpaw:
swiftpaw: what's in your mouth—
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swiftpaw: while i’m gone, fluffpaw, you’re in charge.
fluffpaw: yes!!!
swiftpaw, whispering: ghostpaw, you’re secretly in charge.
ghostpaw: obviously.
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ghostpaw: i’m kind of crushing on someone, but i’m worried about telling you who it is, because you’re not going to like it.
fluffpaw: just rip the bandage off.
ghostpaw: it’s mosspaw.
swiftpaw: put the bandage back on.
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swiftpaw: okay okay stop asking me if i'm cis, genderfluid, trans, whatever. i identify as a FUCKING THREAT.
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shapeshifter: *transforms to look like ghostpaw*
ghostpaw: okay, are you BLIND? you look nothing like me. first off, i'm way taller. secondly, i DO NOT look so sleep deprived and lastly, if you could drag a comb through that hair you're like a 7 on a good day and i've been told i'm a constant 10.
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fluffpaw: you can de-escalate any situation by simply saying, 'are we about to kiss?'
fluffpaw : doesn't work for getting out of speeding tickets, by the way.
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