❝Whispers In The Dark❞ || Gojo x reader

Chapter 39

Fluttering your eyelids, you slowly lifted them. You let the light come to you. 

"Wake up sleepyhead~. We're going to watch a movie." you heard the voice above you. 

You turned slightly upwards to see the Gojo's face. He was so bright and pretty. Until you thought you could look at him for hours. You've seen him so many times, and still think it's the first time. You just don't get used to it as easily as you might think. 

"Gojo...? What happened?" you asked as you stood up leaning against his knee.

"Uh... Nothing special." he groaned, laughing.

You looked at him questioningly before you guessed anything.

"Please don't lie to me..." 

"I... I don't want to lie to you..." he scratched his head nervously. "But it..."

"You don't have to speak if that's better for you..." you replied looking at your lap.

Where your sight was, there he put his hand. He warmed you up immediately. His skin radiated almost warmth. He always reminded you of good now. Not to mention the broken bones and wounds he caused you. Not to mention all the pain you felt because of him. Tera was just nice and sweet. Caring and loving. Nothing he did to you before. Not any more. Let bygones be bygones. And it won't come back. All the pain you felt is gone. Thanks to him, he disappeared. And you don't want him to come back. He was so good for you. Without pain. Only with love. He has always been with you. Always now. He won't leave you now. You won't run away now. You want to be warm with him. You like it when he loves you and caresses you. You like being there. You like to feel safe with him. Because you know he won't do anything bad to you, he'll always stay that way. Because everything he does to you will always disappear. Not the slightest trace will be left.  

The pain is gone.

"I'm not doing this for myself. I already know all this. But I'm doing it for you. It would be better for you. Sometimes ignorance is better. It may not work for you. But you want to know, right?" truth he asked, rubbing the side of his knee with his thumb.

"I want to..." you moaned softly before looking him straight in the eye. There was a desire to look at them and not at the black glasses. That's why you reached out to take them off for him. Download He did not protest. He did nothing. He even tilted his head slightly, letting you do it. He started looking at you so softly. 

"You slept for three hours. Cause me... I put you to sleep with a technique. I had to do that because Nanami came here."

"Huh?"

"He would like to take you away. He thinks I'm hurting you. He thinks I'm keeping you here. That I'm keeping you without your will. That you have no freedom at all. That you just live with me chained, begging someone to release you from me." he said, and his eyes were no longer so calm and so gentle. They were crazier now. "You're naive. He thinks so. I know he could convince you to do so. He could show you that you're really bad for me. He would do anything to show you this. To take you away from me. It just says how insane I am... That I can't do that. And he makes me do it. If only I could, I would have torn off his lips–"

"Please, do not say that." you muttered softly. You put one hand on his shoulder, feeling it tighten to the touch. But then he relaxed with a slightly shaky exhalation. "Are you OK?" you asked.

"Yes... It is only... Emotions. Nothing more." he replied by placing his hand on his forehead. "He's just pissing me off."

"He did something wrong?"

"Yes, for me, yes. For us, yes. Everything I told him and what I did was for us. For you."

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"Senpai?" 

"Do not be afraid. I do it for you. They won't see you, I promise you will be alright. Nobody's gonna hurt you." he said reaching out to you. 

"But senpai, they want us to separate." You groaned looking around. Interschool competitions were a nightmare for you. Especially the first ones you were on. Due to the constant attacks on you, you wanted to rest. That's why you climbed a tree falling on another branch with a pain in your knee. 

"Nobody will keep us apart. Do not worry. I'll be there. I'm just here for you. You do not have to be afraid." he said calmly as he levitated beside you and waited for you to catch him. "Now come on. I will catch you. I will hold you. I'll take care of everything. I will not let you go. I promise no one will touch you again. They won't tear us apart. We will be here together. As always, okay?"

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Whenever he promised you something, he did. He always kept his promises. So why wouldn't he do that now?

"You want to see Nanami?" He asked.

"...What would you like?" 

He was silent for a moment.

"That you would only be with me. So that he does not come close to you. Lest he try to take you away. That he would leave us alone... I want this. If only you don't go with him." he looked at you seriously.

"I... I want peace..." You muttered. "No matter who I am or where, I want to live a peaceful life. And I want to be with who I can live with... And with the one I can't live without..." you said.

You said The only thing he was curious about was who you could live with... And also without whom you couldn't. It was not a straightforward sentence. It had a lot of solutions. And there were several options. He, Nanami, or someone else entirely. And he would not be able to stand it. He wanted all of you for himself. He couldn't let you be given to someone else. He felt the need to be always there. He couldn't get rid of it. He always knew you were perfect for him. He's lived so many times with you. And therefore, even if you prefer someone else, there is no way he will give you up. He will tear you out of someone else's grip so that he can do it himself. He will kill so he can hold you in his arms. 

But he was afraid that you wouldn't be able to choose yourself. He knows very well that you are not normal because of him. That you have two sides. One wants to stay with him and the other wants to get away from him. He knew you were listening to the first one now. You don't want to run away. The latter is reduced because you no longer feel the urge to run away. But it can change because of Nanami.

He already knew it all.

And he was afraid of it the most. It was his worst nightmare. 

The last thing he wanted was to be afraid. He didn't want to show that he was afraid. But he couldn't help but see that you hated him. He didn't want hate. He could bear fear and resentment. But not that you hate him. When you screamed, he didn't feel empty. And when you asked for something as quietly and calmly as when you asked to leave, he couldn't refuse you. He couldn't say anything at all. He could scream but he couldn't stop you. Without screaming, you seemed so weak to him. So vulnerable. And when you had a temper, he thought he might do the same. Everything he liked. He always wanted to show you your seat next to him. And he didn't know how he hurt you. When you were calm, he would find you succumbed to the side who loved him. 

And now you were the combination of the two sides. The one who didn't want to know him and forgot about him, and the one who loves him. It's such a peaceful connection that he didn't know if it was you. Reluctance combined with desire. Hate with love. Misfortune with happiness. Sadness with joy. Everything was almost equal. Almost. Because positive emotions began to take over.

"Gojo...?" you groaned, wanting to ask something.

"Can you call me Satoru?" he asked, putting his head on yours as he hugged you lightly.

"Satoru." you repeated testing the pronunciation of the name.

"Mhm. Sweetheart? What would you like?" 

"Could... Could you please invite Nanami again?" 

"What for?" he asked, clenching his hand on your side.

"I'd like to see him. And maybe a moment to talk. But I want asked... Could you... Could you please do something... That I would not remember it later?"