Invader Zim x Reader Oneshots/Headcannons (Indefinite Haitus)

'Funky Alien' Zim x GN! Reader (Rewritten)

Requested by: me (Rewritten)

(This is an AU where they are in highskool, Dib is just a little less crazy and Zim is the same. That's the only difference. You/Yours pronouns used still.)

Skool was the inevitable, seeing as it's a weekday. You got dressed in something you liked, grabbing your stuff and eating breakfast. You walk out to feel the cool air on any exposed skin you had, if any. It's your Sophomore year of highskool, already having survived Freshman year with minimal damage.

The walk to skool felt serene and nice, listening to music or whatever you liked to do on the way. It was nice, the crisp air, looming Halloween in the distance, and cozy blankets ready to come out of the closet. So when you get into the school, the air was slightly warmer and welcome. A small smile makes its way to your face as you grab the things you need for your first class. Your locker looks just how you like it and once you're done getting what you need, you shut your locker door, locking it and turning on your heel to get to class.

Class with Ms. Bitters was basically a free-for-all, allowing you to do whatever you wanted while occasionally talking about something needed for a test. You sat in your seat, placing your things down and getting set for whatever you do in your "free period". So, you do as you please, arriving a little early. Then, you see your friend, Dib.

You two were inseparable, to say the least. The adventures you two went on were something 12 year-old you fantasized about when you first discovered indie horror games existed. The thirst for adventure and paranormal was satiated with him. "Hey, dude." You wave him over to sit next to you like usual. "Hey, Reader," he greets you, looking tired. Your brows furrow upon the notice of his disheveled appearance. "Dib, dude, how much sleep did you get last night?" You ask him.

Dib just gives you a lopsided tired smirk, looking crusty as ever, "I didn't." He leans back in his chair like it's cool. This is him prompting you to ask him what's going on. You oblige, giving a smirk yourself and rolling your eyes. "Oh, you didn't, now did you?" you ask sarcastically, "Tell me, what kept you up, man?" Now, you've just set off a bombshell with your questioning.

"Well..." Dib pretends to think, placing his hand on his chin and stroking it playfully, grinning. Yeah, he's fucking with you, "Other than getting alien transmissions last night and finding out aliens are planning to take over Earth, I can't think if a single thing, Reader." Oh, how clever and so cool of him to deliver it like that. That was sarcasm.

"Okay, okay, I get it, something cool happened. Now gimme details," you goad him into telling you what's going on, making a motion to give you something with your hand. With a cheeky smile, leans over and begins whispering all of what happened as more people file in on the bell. It was kinda cool, being the school outcasts and just being so cool. Yeah, totally.

Soon enough, all the chatter goes mute as the door opens, revealing a short, funky-looking green dude. He was roughly the size of a child, scrawny-looking, wearing a pink hoodie, black jeans, black boots, and he had a kind of fake smile on his face, it was more of a scheming smirk, actually. He had his black hair in a shark fin-esque style, magenta eyes, and his teeth appeared completely dull.

He walked to the front and all eyes were on him as Ms. Bitters decided to introduce the new student to our class. He looked like some kind of evil villain, almost comedically so. You nudge Dib jokingly saying how this might be the alien. He didn't seem so jovial.

"Class, I would like to introduce, the newest hopeless appendage to this student body. His name is Zim." She paused for a moment, all was quiet, deadly so. She was terrifying, "Now, if you have anything to say, speak now. Because I don't want to hear a word from you ever again." Ms. Bitters spits with venom laced in every word like a snake.

Maybe that's where the rattle snake rattles kept coming from? That, or the poor state funding to public schools.

"Hello friends, I am a perfectly normal human worm baby! You have noooothing, absolutely nothing to fear from me. Just pay no attention to me, and we'll get along just fine." Zim speaks, sounding incredibly fake. I didn't believe a word spoken from him. That was exactly the alien, and I think Dib recognized the voice. Now I saw why he was mortified.

"Take your seat, Zim. Today's lecture is about outer space and how it will eventually implode in on itself!" Ms. Bitters doesn't bother even moving, just sitting there and seething, staring around the room behind her fogged glasses, "Or, you may do as you please. Just be quiet," she adds.

An effortless silence filled the room as we all whipped out our phones, sketchbooks, math homework, and books. All except Zim. He just raised his hand, smiling like we were in a dystopian film. Well, we are living in a dystopia right now, but this smile appeared stretched and eerily forced.

"Yes Zim?" Ms. Bitters queried, raising an eyebrow. She had already been engrossed in her coffee and book that just said 'Doom' across the cover.

"In the event of say, a full scale alien invasion, how prepared do you think this planet's defenses would be? Tell me." That last sentence was what made me fear him, at least a bit more. How he said it was just off, like everything else about him. There was an uncanny valley about him. You pass Dib a note, not wanting to alert suspicion. 'Is that the alien from your broadcast thing?' you scribbled down on a sticky note and handed it to Dib.

Dib looks around the room at neck breaking speeds before nodding and nodding his head at Zim. Oh, no.

"Leave me alone, Zim. That is an insane question," she dismisses his idea altogether, completely not caring about this situation. Well, good on her. You wouldn't have answered either. "Zim looks slightly dejected at the question, but in what you can only describe in fear for the teacher, he does not retort and instead grumbles about conquering Earth or something.

To cover everything you just did with Dib, you two suddenly become engrossed in what you were individually doing. Yeah, you two weren't totally eavesdropping on the conversation shared between the teacher and Zim. This looked like a new mystery you and Dib would get to embark on together. Something to fill the days and do when you have time. Now this is the high school experience you wanted in middle school.

Since the alien that's stuck invading Earth is Zim, that has only proved to be a socially inept, loud, and possibly very jingoistic alien if he's gonna try and conquer Earth, you don't know whether to be scared for Earth or feel second-hand embarrassment from anything he may do later.