Episode 5

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*Wind blows baby away and it rolls off a cliff*
*On the boat*
Ray: Well. Looks like we're approaching the island ... Yet again ... For like the fourteenth time. Hopefully this path is better than the others.
Willow: You say, as there's jagged rocks and floating debri surrounding us ...
Lizzie: You guys, can we please hurry this up?
Levi: It's okay Lizzie don't worry, we'll be off of this boat soon enough.
Penny: Aww, but do we have to get off? I've had such a blast going on this trip with all my friends!
Arya: Penny, if I have to stay on this boat with you any longer, I'm going to—
*Baby falls on Arya's knee from the sky*
*Goo goo ga ga*
Arya: What the fuck is this thing? Gah!
*Arya stands up and throws the baby away*
Willow: Arya! What the hell?! That was a freaking baby!
Arya: What? — Oh ... Oop.
Ray: I'm pretty sure you could go to jail for that.
Arya: Meh, I'm not scared of being locked up behind bars.

*Serena runs and stops*
Serena: 5:41 mile! Not too bad, but I can do much better!
*Leaves rumbling*
Serena: What was that? Hello?
*Leaves rumbling again*
Serena: What the heck is that noise?
*Leaves rumble and Iris comes out*
Serena: Oh, it's just you! The girl who tried to vote me out for no reason!
Iris: Oh that's very dense, coming from you. You promised not to vote for me, then you did!
Serena: Well I wasn't planning on it! But after Milo told me that you wanted to take over the team, I couldn't let that happen!
Iris: What? So you vote for me because you didn't want me to -- Wait, Milo told you that? It's not even true!
Serena: Why would that little shithead make that up?
Iris: I don't know, but he told me that you were gonna vote me off anyway ...
Serena: What? I never even talked to him about my vote until he came up to me! Besides, why would I vote for my only friend here?
Iris: ... Did we get played ... By MILO?
Serena: ... Aww fuck!
Iris: There's no way that Milo thought of that plan all by himself.
Serena: I mean, he does hang around Ariana a lot! Not that she would really be smart enough to orchestrate any sort of plan like that.
Iris: Have you met Ariana before? Of course she'd do that! Her gears turn 24/7 to figure out how to create drama!
Serena: I guess you make a point ... Well what do we do now? I don't like being played!
Iris: Well obviously we have to get revenge on her. We should throw the next challenge.
Serena: Absolutely not! No form of cheating or losing on purpose is allowed in my books!
Iris: Then how are we supposed to get rid of her?
Serena: We can torment her for now! And should we happen to lose, then she's gone!
Iris: Alright, sounds good to me. Sorry for voting you...
Serena: It's okay, it wasn't your fault--
*Jordan runs past*
Serena: Ugh! Why does he totally ignore me now ...
Iris: Are you ... Actually upset that he's moved on?
Serena: ... No! I just miss the competitiveness, that's all ...
Iris: Huh. Alright. Well, good talk Serena. I'll see you later.
(C) Serena: I absolutely hate when other don't play fair! There's no sense in winning if it isn't done fairly! Ariana and her slave better watch out! ... But why won't Jordan acknowledge me anymore? He really knows how to light a fire under me! ... Not that I need one!

*In the eating area*
*Jesse enters and sees Blair sitting alone*
Jesse: Alright. Let's do this.
(C) Jesse: I feel like spending time away from her this season is sort of counter-productive. That, and I've decided I have no idea what I'm doing anyway, so I'm just gonna wing this.
*Jesse grabs a plate full of sushi and comes over to Blair*
Jesse: Hey Blair. Want some sushi?
Blair: Uh, sure, thanks ... Aren't you supposed to be in the mansion?
Jesse: Yeah, but I wanted to see you. I feel like I haven't at all.
Blair: Oh ... Well, okay ... It's nice to finally be able to talk to you again. My team is stupid.
Jesse: Really? They all seem pretty nice.
Blair: Yeah, well I guess you would know. You seem pretty safe on your team ...
Jesse: Eh, I don't know about that. I should be okay for now, but once we lose a couple times I'll be gone.
Blair: Well, can you keep a secret?
Jesse: Of course, what's up?
Blair: I found another idol.
Jesse: Shit, you're good at that. Great job. What are you thinking of doing with this one?
(C) Blair: What I'm about to say does not make me weak, do you hear me?
Blair: I wanna switch teams so I can be with you ...
Jesse: Oh ... Wow that'd be awesome! I'd really like that.
Blair: Good ... I'd probably swap with Chloe.
Jesse: Good call.
(C) Jesse: Having Blair on the team would be amazing ... But it also puts me in a reaaaaaally bad spot. Seeing how I just alligned myself with the Bro Squad. I'm really not interested in having to choose sides again ... So we're gonna have to win out. Shouldn't be too hard, right?
Jesse: Hey, I also wanted to ask you something ...
Blair: Yes?
*Jesse sweeps everything off the table and stands on it*
Jesse: Blair ... Will you be my girlfriend?
Blair: Uhh ... No. That's ... Not how I wanted to be asked out. Too assertive. Reminded me of my father.
Jesse: Oh ... Oops ...
Blair: I'll ... Give you another shot. *leaves*
Jesse: Well that went from real good to real bad, real quick.
(C) Jesse: Should have realized the daddy issue thing. I thought she would like the whole "sweep items off the table" thing. I guess it was too much. Back to the drawing board.
(C) Blair: I can only take one step at a time ... It's not that I don't wanna be with him ... I just wasn't ready ... So don't call me a hypocritical ass or anything, alright? Just let me do what I want.

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